Life is Art

I have been missing from this blog for a while, and I apologize.  A lot has changed since I last posted, but for someone who blogs about choosing joy, I'm pleased to report that I've never been happier in my entire life!

One of the things that makes me so happy is that I've been painting...a LOT.  I think I've probably painted 20 new pieces in the past few weeks.  They aren't all good - in fact, most of them aren't at all, but a few of them just may show a little promise, and that makes me happy.

I'm starting to challenge myself using different mediums, and striving for more detail than I would have in the past.  It's hard, but I LOVE it.  Christy says I'm an artist, and that I need to create to be whole, and I think she's right about that.  I've always loved to create, but I fit it in when I could.  Now that I'm doing it all the time, it's kind of addictive.  I can see why artists choose to starve over selling out...once you get that natural high, it would be very hard to let go of.

Thankfully, my ego is in tact, even though I'm creating art along the side of an amazing *real* artist.  She has already taught me so much, and I feel so blessed.

Alas, it is time to lower myself back down from the clouds.  For now, my dreams of becoming a starving artist will be very real soon if I don't get back to work.  ;-)

Be good to yourself.

Garageband

I bought an iMac last year to work on my documentary, and it has been quite an adjustment getting used to using a computer that isn't a PC.  I still have a PC and a laptop that I use most of the time, but I have the iMac for creative projects.  I have started and stopped my documentary work many times because iMovie can be a bit confusing, but now I have a book to help me through it.

Macs also come with a program called Garageband, and I have heard great things about it, but I hadn't gotten around to trying it until today.  Let me tell you, it is AWEsome.  I started working on an oil painting this afternoon, and I had the idea to record back up to a hip hop track by only using a canvas (for a painting) as the instrument other than my voice. 

You can layer different sounds to make the track, of course, so I did one layer of me just rhythmically scratching the canvas, which sounded like a record scratch, and then I used it as a few different drum sounds, and I also added a few layers of me beat boxing, and then I wrote the lyrics to go with it, and I recorded the chorus and the rap that goes along with it.  What fun! 

I'm going to re-record the whole thing another time because I know how to use the program better now that I played around with it, and then I'll post a link to the song.

You can record original sounds, vocals, instruments, etc...  You can also use the software instruments that are preloaded into the program, so I also recorded a dance/trance track that came out really cool.  You can actually use the keyboard as a piano, drum set, guitar, etc...

I know I'm going to have a LOT of fun with this program, and I'll probably record a full length album in my home office.  Unless I upgrade my equipment, it certainly wouldn't be professional quality, but I think it would be fun for friends and youtube at the very least.  :)

I also ended up finishing the oil painting I started, and I think it will look cool in the new movie theater nook we have. 

I absolutely love to create, and I am going to make a conscious effort to spend a little time each week working on creative projects.  That's my goal at least!

A little stab of love

Darcy had an appointment for acupuncture earlier this week, and I decided I wanted to join her and take part in the fun!  I'd never been before, but I'm open to all new life experiences.  There is a wonderful little place in Manchester called Manchester Acupuncture Studio, and they operate under the philosophy that acupuncture is a valid medical option and it should not be cost prohibative.

As such, they price their sessions between $15 and $35 - you choose what you can afford to pay.  To keep costs down, they model the traditional community room setting that was most traditional in acupuncture settings in Asia.

We started by answering a fairly in depth medical questionnaire, and then we met with a consultant and discussed what our goals were, as well as our initial treatment plans.  Then we went into a cozy room with brick walls, high ceilings, lights, plants, and soothing sounds where we relaxed in a recliner and suggled up with a blanket while the hair thin needles were inserted into key locations, based upon our goals.

It was incredibly relaxing.  Many people fall into deep sleep that lasts for hours, and that is encouraged.  Others may just rest for 20-30 minutes and feel that is enough.  We were in that group, though they did warn us that the more we visit, the more comfortable we will be, so we may stay longer and longer. 

I can't wait to go again, and I'm in luck, because I have another appointment this morning!

With a song in my heart

While I do my best to choose joy daily, sometimes the things that take up the majority of my time in life end up souring my outlook, just a bit.  It's probably no coincidence that I have these feelings around the time I PMS, but there will always be those annoying times at life that cause us to choose misery and despair over joy.  It's our job to make sure we fight back.

Last night, I was feeling kind of blah.  I have a never ending pile of work to be done, that I couldn't possibly complete in normal business hours, my classes this semester are a time draining annoyance to me, and I can't seem to find the time to do all the work, I need to spend a lot of time working out to accomplish my weight loss and fitness goals, I need to devote about a month to reorganizing my house to make it work for me, and by the time I'm done with all of that stuff, when am I supposed to do the things I am passionate about?

Well, I truly don't know.  What I do know, however, is that when I feel this way, I need to take a step back and slow down.  If I don't, 10 years will pass and I'll be troubled by the same things. 

To give myself a moment to reflect, I decided to spend sometime outside in my hot tub, staring up at the sky and consider the things I care about.  I know I want to spend my life creating, doing good, being a force of positive change, laughing, loving and spreading joy.  Until I can afford to do that full time, I need to make sure I have time for these things in my day to day life.

Today, I decided to bring my iPod to work with me.  Work can be drainging, but it's a lot more fun if I'm chair dancing.  You should try it.

Sometimes the littlest of things are all we need to get us over a hump until we find our way back to our paths.

A lovely morning

I didn't have to be up early this morning, but I was done sleeping at 5:30 AM, so I headed to the gym.  I know that most people (including me usually!) go to the gym to work out, but I had a different agenda today.  My back and neck are still quite sore, so I just went in for a quick tanning session.  I know that tanning isn't good for you if you do it all the time, but I think if you just do it a few times in the winter, it can't possibly do long term damage...at least that's what I tell myself!  :)

As I laid in the tanning bed, I closed my eyes and pictured that I was lying on the beach in Ft. Lauderdale, with the big green waves crashing on the shore, and the sun beating down on me.  Ahhhhhhhhhh.

This is the first winter (in as long as I can remember) that I haven't planned a trip south (Dallas and Atlanta don't count because I said so).  I know there's still time, and I probably will, but I don't know....Darcy really doesn't have any time off, so it would have to be a weekend thing, and I don't know if I want to risk getting sick on the plane (which ALWAYS happens) for just a weekend away. 

It doesn't hurt that we have Paris and Tuscany to look forward to in April...

So every once in a while, I go for a tan, and I pretend that it's not winter, and that it's the sun making me warm, and not gross synthetic bulbs.  I think we all get a touch of seasonal affective disorder, and it's a good idea to find those things that help us escape the winter blues.

When I came home, I decided to go into the hot tub, and while I soaked, I watched the sun rise over the frozen lake, and I thanked God for all the beauty and the blessings in my life.

Imagine One Voice

As many of you know, I recently created a group called Imagine One Voice to raise up solutions to pressing social issues to political leaders.  Today I will be meeting with some members of Senator Shaheen's staff to discuss some of these solutions.  My hopes for this meeting are really just to leave with a plan to push some of these solutions forward. 

I have drafted a very simple presentation that outlines the objectives of the discussion, as well as some very high level descriptions of possible solutions to the current jobs crisis in the US.  I have a unique skill set, and I think my experience in Human Resources and my interest in the economy and bipartisan political initiatives should suit me well to being part of the solution.

I am willing to wager that there are probably many people like me who have skills and interest to contribute to solving some of our nation's toughest problems.  Right now, too many hands are in the pot in Washington.  Fixing something as simple as no longer offering tax breaks to US companies off shoring work and business, is ridden with implications to agendas on the right and the left. 

We need to take the politics of the issues out of the issues alltogether.  We need to give some control back to the people who aren't worried about getting campaign financing or re-elections or deals that have been made - people who just want to see this country set on a course for success and wellness. 

The idea behind Imagine One Voice is very simple - it's just the concept that one person's voice can be heard.  One person can make a difference.  Right now, our group has 69 members, and we are growing every day.  I'm hoping that the meeting today will lead to new opportunities, and that our voices can unite as we identify real, relevant, meaningful solutions to the issues we face today.

Web site:  http://www.imagineonevoice.com/
Facebook group:  http://www.facebook.com/#/group.php?gid=192305551694&ref=ts

New year, New Clothes

I have been working hard to lose weight, and I want to feel good about myself in the process.  I ended up buying some shoes, accessories, several shirts, a few blazers, jeans...I think that was it.  Here are a few of the items:

I ordered them all on Amazon, so I won't have them for a week or so, but I'm really looking forward to their arrival!!

New Year's Resolutions

I think we all know for the most part that New Year's Resolutions do not generally stick, but that doesn't stop me from taking time each New Year's (and at other points during the year) to assess where I am, where I want to go, and put goals in place for myself.

Let's see how I did on the goals I had this last year:

• Write 4 songs to sell  - I started at least four, and I finished a few, but they aren't ready to sell yet
• Finish Documentary - I need to learn how to use my iMac and iMovie first, but I am about 30% done
• Record a CD - DONE!
• Stick to my budget - Eh...not so much, but probably 80%
• Eat whole, locally grown organic foods - 50% so far
• Spend lots of time outside - DONE!
• Launch my business - DONE!
• Publish 6 articles - DONE!
• Write 2 books in the next 12 months - No, but I have about 60 pages of one book done so far
• Read 3-4 books each month - DONE!
• Write every day - DONE!
• Work out 6-7 days/week - about 25% of the time
• Lose 80 lbs - 0% done

Overall, I accomplished the majority of my goals, and I made headway on some of the others.  I am sure I did more than I would have without the goals, so I will continue setting goals! 

Here are my goals for 2010:

• Complete my current degree program
• Lose 80 lbs
• Complete at least one sprint triathlon
• Complete writing one book
• Complete one film, no matter how short

I'm trying to be more realistic with myself, which is why I have fewer goals this year than last.  I was going to try to just pick one, but that's silly.  The first three items on the list are already done in my head - they are must do's, so the last 2 are the stretch goals.  If I can write a book, complete one film, lose all the weight I have to lose, finish my degree and complete a triathlon in 2010, I will be thrilled.  That will be a good year.

There are other things I hope to accomplish, such as my work with Imagine One Voice, financial goals and career goals, but those ambitions will be the gravy to the core essential goals I've listed above.  I feel it's important for short term goals to match long term goals, and I've been giving a lot of thought to my long term goals recently as well.

I want to be financially stable enough that I am not limited on life choices due to financial obligations, as I am currently.  I own 2 homes, one of which I'm significantly upside down in, and another which I may be somewhat upside down in.  I bought them both right before the market crashed...back when I still thought real estate was a no brainer investment.  Silly me.  Right now, I am tied down to my current location and current income bracket due to my financial obligations.  Someday, I would like to return to the place where I could make life decisions based upon what I believed I should do, not based upon what I had to do.

I am not alone.  I think most people I know are really owned by their homes and debts.  I would like to free myself of any chains that may hold me down.  Thankfully, I work in healthcare, and I find meaning in the mission behind the work I do, but I still know my financial obligations have limited my choices to some extent.

My long term goal is a bit vague...I just want to leave this world a little better off than it was when I found it.  I want the people in my life to live better lives because of the impact I had on them...  I want to always strive for justice and fight for human rights, globally.  I want to help feed people who are hungry, help the unemployed find work, and make peace. 

I know that may sound naive, but that's what I plan to do.  That's what I do now when I can, and I'm hoping that with age, I can spend more and more time accomplishing those goals.

To feed my soul and spirit, I will continue to embrace the arts, search for beauty everywhere, travel to the ends of the earth, continue my spiritual journey, and function as a relentless student of life.

I really sound like an idealistic 19 year old here...it's funny to think that part of me is a 33 year old yuppie, card carrying member of the rat race.  I keep myself from being too grounded by embracing a youthful spirit and wonder, coloring outside of the lines, and taking very little seriously. 

Anyway, I is who I is, and I like myself.  I hope you can say the same for you.  :) 

Happy New Year to all!!