Choosing Joy

Life is Art

2010-05-18T06:30:00.000-07:00

I have been missing from this blog for a while, and I apologize. A lot has changed since I last posted, but for someone who blogs about choosing joy, I'm pleased to report that I've never been happier in my entire life!

One of the things that makes me so happy is that I've been painting...a LOT. I think I've probably painted 20 new pieces in the past few weeks. They aren't all good - in fact, most of them aren't at all, but a few of them just may show a little promise, and that makes me happy.

I'm starting to challenge myself using different mediums, and striving for more detail than I would have in the past. It's hard, but I LOVE it. Christy says I'm an artist, and that I need to create to be whole, and I think she's right about that. I've always loved to create, but I fit it in when I could. Now that I'm doing it all the time, it's kind of addictive. I can see why artists choose to starve over selling out...once you get that natural high, it would be very hard to let go of.

Thankfully, my ego is in tact, even though I'm creating art along the side of an amazing *real* artist. She has already taught me so much, and I feel so blessed.

Alas, it is time to lower myself back down from the clouds. For now, my dreams of becoming a starving artist will be very real soon if I don't get back to work. ;-)

Be good to yourself.

Garageband

2010-03-06T17:40:00.000-08:00

I bought an iMac last year to work on my documentary, and it has been quite an adjustment getting used to using a computer that isn't a PC. I still have a PC and a laptop that I use most of the time, but I have the iMac for creative projects. I have started and stopped my documentary work many times because iMovie can be a bit confusing, but now I have a book to help me through it.

Macs also come with a program called Garageband, and I have heard great things about it, but I hadn't gotten around to trying it until today. Let me tell you, it is AWEsome. I started working on an oil painting this afternoon, and I had the idea to record back up to a hip hop track by only using a canvas (for a painting) as the instrument other than my voice.

You can layer different sounds to make the track, of course, so I did one layer of me just rhythmically scratching the canvas, which sounded like a record scratch, and then I used it as a few different drum sounds, and I also added a few layers of me beat boxing, and then I wrote the lyrics to go with it, and I recorded the chorus and the rap that goes along with it. What fun!

I'm going to re-record the whole thing another time because I know how to use the program better now that I played around with it, and then I'll post a link to the song.

You can record original sounds, vocals, instruments, etc... You can also use the software instruments that are preloaded into the program, so I also recorded a dance/trance track that came out really cool. You can actually use the keyboard as a piano, drum set, guitar, etc...

I know I'm going to have a LOT of fun with this program, and I'll probably record a full length album in my home office. Unless I upgrade my equipment, it certainly wouldn't be professional quality, but I think it would be fun for friends and youtube at the very least. :)

I also ended up finishing the oil painting I started, and I think it will look cool in the new movie theater nook we have.

I absolutely love to create, and I am going to make a conscious effort to spend a little time each week working on creative projects. That's my goal at least!

A little stab of love

2010-02-18T04:34:00.000-08:00

Darcy had an appointment for acupuncture earlier this week, and I decided I wanted to join her and take part in the fun! I'd never been before, but I'm open to all new life experiences. There is a wonderful little place in Manchester called Manchester Acupuncture Studio, and they operate under the philosophy that acupuncture is a valid medical option and it should not be cost prohibative.

As such, they price their sessions between $15 and $35 - you choose what you can afford to pay. To keep costs down, they model the traditional community room setting that was most traditional in acupuncture settings in Asia.

We started by answering a fairly in depth medical questionnaire, and then we met with a consultant and discussed what our goals were, as well as our initial treatment plans. Then we went into a cozy room with brick walls, high ceilings, lights, plants, and soothing sounds where we relaxed in a recliner and suggled up with a blanket while the hair thin needles were inserted into key locations, based upon our goals.

It was incredibly relaxing. Many people fall into deep sleep that lasts for hours, and that is encouraged. Others may just rest for 20-30 minutes and feel that is enough. We were in that group, though they did warn us that the more we visit, the more comfortable we will be, so we may stay longer and longer.

I can't wait to go again, and I'm in luck, because I have another appointment this morning!

With a song in my heart

2010-02-09T06:59:00.000-08:00

While I do my best to choose joy daily, sometimes the things that take up the majority of my time in life end up souring my outlook, just a bit. It's probably no coincidence that I have these feelings around the time I PMS, but there will always be those annoying times at life that cause us to choose misery and despair over joy. It's our job to make sure we fight back.

Last night, I was feeling kind of blah. I have a never ending pile of work to be done, that I couldn't possibly complete in normal business hours, my classes this semester are a time draining annoyance to me, and I can't seem to find the time to do all the work, I need to spend a lot of time working out to accomplish my weight loss and fitness goals, I need to devote about a month to reorganizing my house to make it work for me, and by the time I'm done with all of that stuff, when am I supposed to do the things I am passionate about?

Well, I truly don't know. What I do know, however, is that when I feel this way, I need to take a step back and slow down. If I don't, 10 years will pass and I'll be troubled by the same things.

To give myself a moment to reflect, I decided to spend sometime outside in my hot tub, staring up at the sky and consider the things I care about. I know I want to spend my life creating, doing good, being a force of positive change, laughing, loving and spreading joy. Until I can afford to do that full time, I need to make sure I have time for these things in my day to day life.

Today, I decided to bring my iPod to work with me. Work can be drainging, but it's a lot more fun if I'm chair dancing. You should try it.

Sometimes the littlest of things are all we need to get us over a hump until we find our way back to our paths.

A lovely morning

2010-01-27T04:13:00.000-08:00

I didn't have to be up early this morning, but I was done sleeping at 5:30 AM, so I headed to the gym. I know that most people (including me usually!) go to the gym to work out, but I had a different agenda today. My back and neck are still quite sore, so I just went in for a quick tanning session. I know that tanning isn't good for you if you do it all the time, but I think if you just do it a few times in the winter, it can't possibly do long term damage...at least that's what I tell myself! :)

As I laid in the tanning bed, I closed my eyes and pictured that I was lying on the beach in Ft. Lauderdale, with the big green waves crashing on the shore, and the sun beating down on me. Ahhhhhhhhhh.

This is the first winter (in as long as I can remember) that I haven't planned a trip south (Dallas and Atlanta don't count because I said so). I know there's still time, and I probably will, but I don't know....Darcy really doesn't have any time off, so it would have to be a weekend thing, and I don't know if I want to risk getting sick on the plane (which ALWAYS happens) for just a weekend away.

It doesn't hurt that we have Paris and Tuscany to look forward to in April...

So every once in a while, I go for a tan, and I pretend that it's not winter, and that it's the sun making me warm, and not gross synthetic bulbs. I think we all get a touch of seasonal affective disorder, and it's a good idea to find those things that help us escape the winter blues.

When I came home, I decided to go into the hot tub, and while I soaked, I watched the sun rise over the frozen lake, and I thanked God for all the beauty and the blessings in my life.

Imagine One Voice

2010-01-15T08:53:00.000-08:00

As many of you know, I recently created a group called Imagine One Voice to raise up solutions to pressing social issues to political leaders. Today I will be meeting with some members of Senator Shaheen's staff to discuss some of these solutions. My hopes for this meeting are really just to leave with a plan to push some of these solutions forward.

I have drafted a very simple presentation that outlines the objectives of the discussion, as well as some very high level descriptions of possible solutions to the current jobs crisis in the US. I have a unique skill set, and I think my experience in Human Resources and my interest in the economy and bipartisan political initiatives should suit me well to being part of the solution.

I am willing to wager that there are probably many people like me who have skills and interest to contribute to solving some of our nation's toughest problems. Right now, too many hands are in the pot in Washington. Fixing something as simple as no longer offering tax breaks to US companies off shoring work and business, is ridden with implications to agendas on the right and the left.

We need to take the politics of the issues out of the issues alltogether. We need to give some control back to the people who aren't worried about getting campaign financing or re-elections or deals that have been made - people who just want to see this country set on a course for success and wellness.

The idea behind Imagine One Voice is very simple - it's just the concept that one person's voice can be heard. One person can make a difference. Right now, our group has 69 members, and we are growing every day. I'm hoping that the meeting today will lead to new opportunities, and that our voices can unite as we identify real, relevant, meaningful solutions to the issues we face today.

Web site: http://www.imagineonevoice.com/
Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/#/group.php?gid=192305551694&ref=ts

New year, New Clothes

2010-01-10T17:16:00.000-08:00

I have been working hard to lose weight, and I want to feel good about myself in the process. I ended up buying some shoes, accessories, several shirts, a few blazers, jeans...I think that was it. Here are a few of the items:

I ordered them all on Amazon, so I won't have them for a week or so, but I'm really looking forward to their arrival!!

New Year's Resolutions

2010-01-02T17:48:00.000-08:00

I think we all know for the most part that New Year's Resolutions do not generally stick, but that doesn't stop me from taking time each New Year's (and at other points during the year) to assess where I am, where I want to go, and put goals in place for myself.

Let's see how I did on the goals I had this last year:

Write 4 songs to sell - I started at least four, and I finished a few, but they aren't ready to sell yet
Finish Documentary - I need to learn how to use my iMac and iMovie first, but I am about 30% done
Record a CD - DONE!
Stick to my budget - Eh...not so much, but probably 80%
Eat whole, locally grown organic foods - 50% so far
Spend lots of time outside - DONE!
Launch my business - DONE!
Publish 6 articles - DONE!
Write 2 books in the next 12 months - No, but I have about 60 pages of one book done so far
Read 3-4 books each month - DONE!
Write every day - DONE!
Work out 6-7 days/week - about 25% of the time
Lose 80 lbs - 0% done

Overall, I accomplished the majority of my goals, and I made headway on some of the others. I am sure I did more than I would have without the goals, so I will continue setting goals!

Here are my goals for 2010:

Complete my current degree program
Lose 80 lbs
Complete at least one sprint triathlon
Complete writing one book
Complete one film, no matter how short

I'm trying to be more realistic with myself, which is why I have fewer goals this year than last. I was going to try to just pick one, but that's silly. The first three items on the list are already done in my head - they are must do's, so the last 2 are the stretch goals. If I can write a book, complete one film, lose all the weight I have to lose, finish my degree and complete a triathlon in 2010, I will be thrilled. That will be a good year.

There are other things I hope to accomplish, such as my work with Imagine One Voice, financial goals and career goals, but those ambitions will be the gravy to the core essential goals I've listed above. I feel it's important for short term goals to match long term goals, and I've been giving a lot of thought to my long term goals recently as well.

I want to be financially stable enough that I am not limited on life choices due to financial obligations, as I am currently. I own 2 homes, one of which I'm significantly upside down in, and another which I may be somewhat upside down in. I bought them both right before the market crashed...back when I still thought real estate was a no brainer investment. Silly me. Right now, I am tied down to my current location and current income bracket due to my financial obligations. Someday, I would like to return to the place where I could make life decisions based upon what I believed I should do, not based upon what I had to do.

I am not alone. I think most people I know are really owned by their homes and debts. I would like to free myself of any chains that may hold me down. Thankfully, I work in healthcare, and I find meaning in the mission behind the work I do, but I still know my financial obligations have limited my choices to some extent.

My long term goal is a bit vague...I just want to leave this world a little better off than it was when I found it. I want the people in my life to live better lives because of the impact I had on them... I want to always strive for justice and fight for human rights, globally. I want to help feed people who are hungry, help the unemployed find work, and make peace.

I know that may sound naive, but that's what I plan to do. That's what I do now when I can, and I'm hoping that with age, I can spend more and more time accomplishing those goals.

To feed my soul and spirit, I will continue to embrace the arts, search for beauty everywhere, travel to the ends of the earth, continue my spiritual journey, and function as a relentless student of life.

I really sound like an idealistic 19 year old here...it's funny to think that part of me is a 33 year old yuppie, card carrying member of the rat race. I keep myself from being too grounded by embracing a youthful spirit and wonder, coloring outside of the lines, and taking very little seriously.

Anyway, I is who I is, and I like myself. I hope you can say the same for you. :)

Happy New Year to all!!

Beating a dead horse...but couldn't help it...

2009-12-30T09:23:00.000-08:00

Accenture must want a refund, big time...their whole campaign plays into these jokes way too easily. Oh well...

I don't think the fame and money we throw at our celebreties is good for anyone. It's not good for them, it's not good for kids who grow up thinking they have to be megarich/megasuccessful/megabeautiful to have made it... What's that song out right now? Drake? "I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful..." He sings about how he wants the money and the cars and the clothes, and he equates that with being successful.

I bet Tiger Woods doesn't feel very successful. He's the epitome of success, but he's failed himself and his family. I feel for him, though. If from the time you are young, you are meant to feel like a god, invicible, you're going to start believing it. It's not healthy. That's not to say he doesn't have free will, but I think we can find more examples of "successful" celebrities that are really just a big hot mess, than the examples who have used their fame and fortune to live good, healthy lives. It's human nature.

Our celebrities are kind of like our false gods...yet our worship for them is what ends up destroying them. It's kind of interesting to see. We chew them up and spit them out when we no longer have any use for them.

Dance, monkey, dance!

It's no wonder child stars end up being the dregs of society. What else have they been set up for? They are hearing they are the center of the universe during their formative years, and then the reality is that no one has any use for them anymore, and the highlight of their life was at age 5 or 8 or 14. The rest of life is a giant disappointment.

Part of my job involves compensation strategy. We look at the market, the job duties, etc... and we deterimine what each job is worth. Generally, with more responsibility, comes greater compensation.

Not that I think government should regulate compensation, but how is it that a paramedic, responsible for saving lives, is paid half of what a customer service rep at Verizon makes? Why does the president of the US make far less than a CEO of any old company in the US? Why do our actors and athletes make millions more than the scientists and researchers who are responsible for curing cancer, or national defense?

Why do we even allow athletes and actors to make 10s of millions of dollars, when we could just take a fraction of their salaries and feed the hungry? It seems a bit corrupt and immoral or at least amoral, when you look at it that way.

In the mean time, our misguided values will create and destry more Tiger Woods', Charlie Sheen's and Britney Murphy's.

Holiday travel

2009-12-23T05:29:00.000-08:00

I tend to avoid situations that are unpleasant, so as of yet, I have never flown anywhere in peak travel times. In general, I take my vacations Wednesday to Wednesday because it's a good day to travel. I almost never fly on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday because I know they are such high volume days. When we flew to Dallas 2 weekends ago, we flew out on a Friday night and back on a Sunday afternoon. The flight was one of the only direct flights from Boston to Dallas, so it was packed, as you can imagine. There flights were sold out, and Darcy and I couldn't even sit next to each other on the way home.

That's generally not how I roll. I think that we can cut out a lot of the annoyances of life, just by planning to do so. I know that we are wired to think a vacation lasts from one weekend to the next, but why not book a trip mid week to mid week? Airfare is cheaper, and planes are less crowded. Plus, you get 2 half weeks of work shouldering the trip, so it's kind of like a longer vacation. ;-)

Today, we are flying to Atlanta. It's 2 days before Christmas, and the airports are still playing catch up from the cancelled flights from the weekend. I can't imagine how busy the airport is going to be, but I'm mentally preparing myself already. We are already checked in, with boarding passes printed up, and we aren't checking any luggage, but we plan to arrive at the airport 2 hrs before take off.

That should give us plenty of time to get through security, and if we have extra time, we can enjoy a relaxing meal before we depart. Philadelphia may be a bit more dicey. We have a layover there, and our flight has a winter advisory attached to it. I know they were hit worse with the snow, so I'm sure it will be a zoo. We don't have a ton of time to get from one plane to the next, but we never check any luggage, so all we need to worry about is getting ourselves to the gate on time.

I always prepare myself for the worst, while hoping for the best. If our flights get cancelled, we'll make it there eventually, and everything will be just fine. I do not understand worry. Worry changes nothing, while inhibiting your ability to flex with change. How is that useful?

In life, I try to avoid situations that could be stressful. It's easier than you would think. When potentially stressful situations are unavoidable, I find a plan to manage the possible variances up front. There are always going to be things that are out of our control, and that's fine too. Things in our control, however, can be managed in a way to reduce stress and limit worry. Why leave things to chance that don't need to be?

Limiting stress and anxiety is within our control. Planning and organization are key components, but also finding the ability to let go... "Don't sweat the small stuff...and it's all small stuff" ?? - exactly. :)

The Holiday Spirit

2009-12-22T08:38:00.000-08:00

We are winding down with our holiday work, as we have cookie exchanges, team breakfasts, gift swapping and the like. It's a fun time of year, when people cast aside the layers of trouble and stress and we can all focus on what it means to be alive and to love...so why is everyone so stressed out?

I have talked to so many people already today, and the overall theme has been stress! How will they finish shopping? How can they accommodate all the extra guests who are coming? How can they possibly fit it all in???!!!

Are we missing the point here? Just a little bit? I know my observations are nothing new, so why are we still here? Loved ones, I promise you that I don't care what you get me for gifts. I do appreciate the thought and the efforts, but I'm far more interested in spending time with you, enjoying the holiday spirit, following old traditions and creating new ones... I don't care if the turkey is dry (not that we're having turkey, and certainly not that anyone in my family would ever make a cooking error! LOL), and I don't mind if the houses I visit are not perfectly neat....nobody does. :)

If I ever start to stress out over something that is meant to be a time of peace, love and goodwill, I will no longer celebrate the holidays because I will have clearly missed the point. Our kids will not remember the Zhu Zhu pets they received or the tickle me elmo or the crazy eyed stuffed toy that was so popular years back. They will remember the things we remember from our childhoods - the smell of apple cider in the crock pot, the way Mrs. Post used to corral us to drink her wassail bowl, the big green and red felt "Merry Christmas" sign Mom would hang each black Friday, the straw from the manger scene that I sometimes picked off the roof of the manger when playing with the first family, the songs we would sing that warmed our hearts and souls, the wax from the Christmas Eve candles that would drip through the cups onto our hands, the Christmas Eve gift I would open each year that would always turn out to be warm, cuddley pajamas, Mrs. Porbundawala's lemon bread and the feeling of profound love for my family and celebration as we remembered the story of the birth of Christ.

No amount of advertising or media pressure can take that away from me. That is Christmas to me. The rest of it, I chalk up to accessories to our memories, and they should be treated as just that.

I'm flying to Atlanta for Christmas this year. I'm doing all of my shopping on 12/24. I realize to some, that would cause stress, but I'm not worried about it. Last year, all the gifts I ordered online didn't arrive in time, so I had to do all of my shopping all over again at the last minute when I arrived in Georgia, and it was fine. I won't have the time to hunt down that perfect present for everyone, but who cares? I haven't seen my sister and her family in a year - that's all that matters.

So, gentle readers, if you have been plagued with a bit of the yuletide yucks, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and remember the holidays through you childhood eyes.

Be well!

Mastering the Art of French Cooking

2009-12-21T06:26:00.000-08:00

On the off chance that you happen to live under a rock, and yet still manage to follow this blog, "The Art of French Cooking" is the cookbook that not only put Julia Child on the map, but also transformed the way we cook and eat in America. It consists of 536 recipes, and I've often heard that once you have been able to cook your way through this book, you can cook just about anything. The skills you learn in this book will enable you to master Italian, Mexican and any other cuisine out there. I've always wanted to cook my way through this book, but who has the time?

This weekend, I finally had a chance to watch Julie and Julia - the tale of a blogger who cooked her way through Julia's cookbook in one year, blogging all the way, and now has a book and movie deal. I had asked for the cookbook for my birthday this year, because I knew when I saw the movie, I would need to cook my way through the cookbook as well.

Yesterday, I took my first step into cooking french cuisine. I ended up making 3 recipes from the book, since one of them was dependent upon another. I made Sauté de boeuf à la Parisienne with Champignons Sautés Au Beurre and Pommes de Terre Sautés. Everything sounds so much better in French. Really, what I made was Beef Sauté with Cream and Mushroom Sauce with Mushrooms sauteed in butter and herbs and potatos sauteed in butter. LOL - Healthy! :) Here is a picture of the finished product:

I believe these were some of her easier recipes, and I probably spent at least 90 minutes preparing the meal. Normally, I *never* follow any receipes - I'll take ideas from recipes, but I just do my own thing, and everything usually turns out quite well. The kind of cooking I do, however, and the kind of cooking described in this book are not the same thing at all. It's like the difference between coloring in a coloring book and learning to paint from Picasso. Seriously. But Picasso has somehow learned to teach someone with only skills to color, how to paint pretty close to a professional level.

Julia's genious was not in her cooking, although it was certainly there, but more in relating the most exquisite of techniques into layman's terms. I had a wonderful time following the recipes, and it was a bit challenging. I can only imagine the more robust recipes that are in my future. I can't wait to cook all of them.

The food was absolutely phenomenal. I can say that because I give full credit to Ms. Child. It was abolutely fine dining restaurant quality food that I would confidently serve to any guest I would ever have. I can't believe the difference using the techniques taught in this book makes.

I was supposed to work all day yesterday, but we had a snow storm, and I decided to cook and enjoy wonderful food instead of working. I do not regret my decision at all, even though I'll have to work extra late tonight - we had a *wonderful* day, and I learned a lot!

Friends rock

2009-12-14T06:23:00.000-08:00

When I walked in from the airport yesterday, I was greeted by this BEAUTIFUL bouquet of flowers with all of these cute CD cut outs of the face of my CD. Thank you so much, Alison!

It really made my day, and I brought one of the cut outs to work with me and taped it to my wall. :)

Oh what fun...

2009-12-05T06:23:00.000-08:00

We decorated for Christmas when my parents were here, but we didn't get a tree yet. I think today is going to be the day! It's supposed to snow tonight, and I thought it would be fun to play Christmas songs, have cider or egg nog, and decorate the tree with the backdrop of snow falling. How very Norman Rockwell...

We are going to Noel's Tree Farm in Litchfield to cut down our own tree. They also have hayrides, hot chocolate, marshmallow roasting, live animals and more. I'm excited! I heard their trees are a little on the short side, but that's okay with me. I usually buy a giant tree for the great room, and it always looks dwarfed, in addition to being a giant nuisance.

This year, we are going to put the tree in the parlor room (LOL), near the fireplace. I think it will be very cute there...possibly even darling.

I can't wait!

Public Speaking

2009-12-03T08:08:00.000-08:00

I have spent a great deal of time this week giving presentations, and I don't see that ending any time soon. In my new role, it seems they want me to talk a lot. I don't mind, but it can be hard to get work done if I'm constantly "performing."

I wonder to myself...am I going to have some role or some next step in life that involves a lot of public speaking? Is that why I'm suddenly in public speaking bootcamp? Now, as you know, I've done a good share of public speaking for years, but over the next few months, I'll be doing about 4 presentations each week, on various topics, to various audiences.

I'm wondering if Oprah is behind all this, somehow grooming me to take her place. Oh, O, that is so you!

I gave one presentation this morning, and it went well, and the people were so interested in the topic, that I launched into a condensed version of a separate presentation after, and did both for them. Tadaaaaa!

Look what I can do!

haha

I've been invited to speak at the local prison to help the inmates with job seeking skills when they are released. I think it's a great program, and naturally, I love the opportunity to visit a prison, and of course, I'm bringing TJ. I knew he'd want in on this action too.

It's a great experience to be able to speak to all different kinds of audiences. In fact, perhaps I am the answer to Palin's 2012 run?

LOL - no thanks, Oprah makes way more money and is way more respected and beloved than any president. ;-)

Delusions of grandeur aside, I'm wondering when I'm supposed to get all my work done when I'm presenting or planning for presentations all the time.

Hmmmmmmmm.....

Oh well - I'll git er done.

Oh my, I am a loser

2009-12-01T08:34:00.000-08:00

I'm an envelope pusher. We know this. I like to know how far I can go - I like to know where my boundaries are. So I have a newish car, and I thought I remembered that it wasn't as generous on the empty side as my BMW that seemed to run for 100 miles once it was on E (no exagerration). As it turns out, my memory was correct, and the Mercedes means business when it hits E!

Now, in fairness to my new car, the E light probably went on 3 days ago, but it wasn't until yesterday that it actually hit the bottom line. Still, I drove to and from work to my house, but it wasn't very far under that bottom line, so I thought I'd see if I could make it to work (today, my office was only 3 miles away) with the gas that I had, and I'd stop to refuel on the way home.

When I was 2 blocks from the office, I sat at a red light for what seemed like an eternity when my car stalled out. I was also only 2 blocks from a gas station, so I put my hazards on, thanked my lucky stars I had cash with me b/c I didn't have any credit cards on me, and I had just spent my "emergency" car cash on the movies the other day.

It was cold, but not freezing, so I walked to the gas station, bought a gas container (I have about a thousand at the house) - it was just a one gallon one, and it may as well have been a rocket ship, because it was that confusing to use. The very nice attendant showed me how to assemble it, and work all the gears (yes, there were gears on the thing!!), and I got my gallon of gas and headed back to my car.

I finally figured out how to pump the thing, and I released the lonely gallon of gas into my car. While I was doing this, a few nice people asked if I needed help because NH is a nice state to live in. With the gallon of gas in the tank, I climbed into the drivers' seat and turned the key....nothing.

It turned over, but it kept dying. I called a friend who's a mechanic to ask him if perhaps I just hadn't put enough gas in, because it was *so* empty, that the one gallon wasn't enough for it to go vroom. He said that was doubtful.

I have emergency roadside assistance that I could have used, but naturally, I didn't believe the mechanic. Of course I know more about cars than someone who has worked on them his whole life. After sitting in the car for a while to let it dry out (worried I'd flooded it with all the attempts to start it), it still wouldn't start. Rather than calling my roadside assistance (still), I went back up the hill to the gas station, and bought another gallon of gas.

It was getting colder and windier out, and I was uncomfortable in my attire. My suit looks perfectly fine, but our wonderful new dryer makes all of my shirts too short, so the shirt I had on underneath the suit was only acceptable under the best of conditions. Hiking up hills and bending over to assemble a gas container on a windy day were not compatible conditions to this outfit. I reminded myself how it's so important to wear nice, comfortable clothing that is not dependent upon perfect conditions. LOL

I couldn't open the contraption, so I had to go back into the store (for a third time) to ask the attendant to help me with it. I'm not a person who likes to ask for help, but I didn't suppose I could abandon my car and just go home, so I didn't have much of a choice. I sucked it up, and he helped me.

I brought my second gallon of gas back to my car, emptied it into the tank, and voila - it worked. I was right about this, at least.

Now, this is how much of a loser I really am. When I came back with the first gallon, I had thought to myself that I'd just go to work and fill the tank on my way home. I was going to drive around with less than one gallon in a tank that I had already managed to empty this day.

I think it was karma slapping my face that the first gallon didn't work. ;-) By the time I emptied the second gallon in and it worked, I drove directly to the gas station and filled my tank to the brim.

I have learned my lesson. The Mercedes likes to run on a full tank - you get better gas mileage that way anyway.

I will continue to push envelopes, but not with gas tanks, and not with shirts that need to be longer.

:)

My first webinar

2009-12-01T05:18:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I presented to my first webinar audience. It probably would have been better if I had given my first webinar within my own company, or in a more familiar forum, but I'm kind of a jump in feet first type of person, so of course, I presented my first webinar to over 300 people from all around the US. I really didn't know what to expect, because I haven't even attended many webinars, but I figured I'd get the hang of it.

When we did our trial run, I realized that the software we were using didn't allow some of the formatting I'd planned for in my powerpoint presentation. I also learned that because of the group size, interactivity was limited to poll questions and questions that were typed up that I could read on the side of my screen as I presented, rather than just asking the audience a question and listening to their answers.

There's a lot more multi-tasking that goes into a webinar than a live presentation, I quickly found. I thought that presenting to a group over the phone would be easier than an in person presentation, but I found that was not the case at all. I can't see anyone, so I have no idea if they are with me or not. When I'm presenting, I look for eye contact, nodding of heads, etc... to let me know if I'm on the right track. If certain topics seem to be losing people, I shift gears.

There was none of that. It was me, in my office, talking to a computer screen. Very odd. The whole process made me feel quite old, actually. LOL.

In the end, it turned out very well, as I mentioned, I had over 300 attendees, and only 5 left during the presentation, which is very good for a group that size. You can see the amount of attendees in the top screen, and I've attended webinars that have lost half their audience, easily. People are dialing in from work, and if they are called away, or if the material doesn't resonate, it's very easy to just sign off.

I was really surprised how many people stayed with it. In the end, the feedback I received was very favorable, and they've asked me to present again shortly. As much as I don't love doing these things, I'm sure I will agree to do it again.

It's a good thing to push yourself out of your comfort zone. As humans, we can adapt to just about anything, and each new experience is an opportunity to grow and learn and connect. I saw the movie "Yes, Man" a while back, and while the premise of saying yes to *everything* you are presented with is a bit implausible, saying yes to things that you may not be comfortable with, can be a great life experience for you.

All of our life experiences prepare us for our future, and the greater our capacity, the more we can accomplish.

Achieving Zen

2009-11-30T08:50:00.001-08:00

Thankfully, I'm not overwhelmed as I was when I last posted here. I still have plenty of reasons to feel overwhelmed, but I am not giving them space in my psyche. I am a busy person, and I can only do what I can do. I will do my best, and I will use my time wisely, but I will be peaceful in my efforts.

As I've said many times, worry and anxiety are wasted emotions. I think achieving a zen like state or a state of peace and serenity can be reached in many ways. ...sometimes through prayer, other times through meditation and quiet, sometimes in nature, and even times in music or art...

I started to feel a bit of anxiety earlier today. I'm doing a webinar for hundreds of participants online this afternoon, and as usual, I'm not as prepared as I'd like to be. I just finished making edits to the presentation an hour ago, and my pre-meeting is in one hour - the webinar starts in 2. I haven't been through the entire content yet as a dry run, and I've never done a webinar before, so I don't really know exactly what to expect.

I do know that due to the group size, it won't be interactive, which is what I rely on quite a bit when I present. I like to build interest in the topics I discuss by asking questions and hearing from the participants. Since that isn't the case here, I will basically be lecturing for an hour.

I don't love presenting, but I know it's good for my career, and I also like to share what I've learned with others. The more I do it, the less I mind it, but still, it's one of those things that I'm never 100% comfortable with because I never have enough time to prepare as one should.

I was in a public speaking training a few years back, and the coach suggested that you should rehearse a presentation up to 20 times before giving it live. I'm lucky if I can get one full run through, let alone more than that.

Still, I stopped my anxiety from rising. I'm good at what I do. I know my subject matter. If I don't talk for a full hour, that is fine too. In the scheme of life, this, like most things, is not a big deal...at all...

I want to fit it all in - work, school, play, music, art, tv show, fitness....and sometimes I'm not able to. Sometimes I can only do my best. That is okay. This life of ours is very short, and we only get one shot to make it count. You are in charge of your own attitude. Do not let stress or negativity poison your wonderful stay here on earth.

:)

Overwhelmed

2009-11-23T06:41:00.000-08:00

It's hard not to feel overwhelmed sometimes. I have a high capacity for work and stress, but even I feel overwhlemed...sometimes. Today is one of those days. I have a mountain of work to do, homework that is past due, classes to register for, holiday flights I need to book, presentations I need to plan, a CD to follow up on (because the ball keeps getting dropped!)...and honestly, if I wasn't feeling under the weather, I don't think I'd even notice.

Most days I have a million things to do, and that's just how I roll, but when I'm feeling sick and tired, it just feels like it's all too much. Life is short, and I try to fit it all in. I do choose joy, and I choose vitality, but sometimes I wish I could take a break from myself. I look at the way some other people life, going to work a fairly mindless job, coming home, doing errands, having dinner, watching tv, doing stuff around the house on the weekends, and that's the gig - sometimes I think that would be a nice way to live...but I know I just don't have it in me.

I have too much to say, to express...too much ADHD possibly - LOL... I may just be destined for a very busy life, and even though I'm busy, I still always find time for me as well, because balance is so important. On a day like today, however, I just wish I could take a pass, clear my busy little brain, and have things a little less complicated.

That's not going to happen, though, and I know I'm only feeling that way because I don't feel well and I'm tired, and I have so much to do, so rather than continuing to feel overwhelmed, I'm going to make a list of everything I need to do for work and home and school and everything else, and I'm going to finish everything on that list today. I'm not going to go to bed until it's all done.

That's my plan. Having a plan already makes me feel like I can breathe. Ahhhh....

...al...most....there......

2009-11-17T05:06:00.000-08:00

I met with my academic advisors yesterday, and we spent a looong time going over all my credits and looking at all the courses/requirements I still need to complete to finish. I switched my major 10 times (at least), so as a result, some of the classes I took just didn't fit into any slots - others had expired - and others I managed to take multiple times because I was never very organized about my approach to completing.

I really didn't care. I just knew I should be in school and at some point, I was bound to finish. Apparently, it takes slightly more planning. LOL. It's just been such an after/after/after/after thought of mine. Anyway, we compared my expertise and knowledge base to my remaining requirements, and apparently, I only have 2 classes left.

I've known I was close for a while, but without having an organized approach, it could have taken me another decade or so. As long as those 2 classes are available during the winter intensive session, I will be done with my classes in January. After that, I'll need to prepare porfolio upon portfolio to satisfy all the other requirements. They have warned me that these projects are very labor intensive, but I have a feeling it won't be so bad.

I can't apply for graduation until all of my portfolios have been submitted, and I have to apply for graduation 6 months before it actually happens, so the Good Lord only knows when that will be, but the important thing here is that I'm almost done.

I'm thinking of really shooting for the stars and getting a substandard graduate degree next. Watch out!

Working for the weekend

2009-11-10T08:28:00.000-08:00

I haven't been used to working in the same office 5 days/week, and it's been an adjustment for me. I have always worked long hours, but I've had the flexibility to work from home or Panera bread or from any number of offices... I feel very restricted in this regimented schedule, and I just need to make it work for me. It's the reality of my life for the next few years.

For the first time in years, I am religiously looking forward to the weekend, because I equate the weekend with freedom. Monday - Friday, I have to be in the office early every morning, put in about a 10 hr day, get home, work out, do homework, sometimes do more work, and then watch tv. What a horridly boring existance!! It's depressing! I don't know how the workforce puts up with this.

So I've joined the ranks of those working for the weekend. I've written off Monday - Friday afternoon as wasted life, and I pin all my hopes on Friday night - Sunday night...but even though I don't have to be in the office on the weekend, I still have to work and do homework, and run errands, and pay bills, and get the house in order, and work out, and it's just a never ending cycle of soul draining activities.

There really is a point here about choosing joy... LOL

I need to stop looking at my life in those terms. If all the things I spend my time on are soul draining, I need to think about if that's the best way I should be spending my time. I know I have to work, but maybe I don't need to work so many hours. I know I need to work out, but maybe if I worked out in the AM before work, I wouldn't feel like my whole night was taken up. I have to finish school (even though I think it's silly), but I should set aside specific times I do homework, so that I don't have a little bit hanging over my head every night.

I haven't been able to work on any of my projects lately, and I'm disappointed about that. This is the stuff I enjoy, and I need to get my office ready, so that when I go home from work, I can do the things that do feed my soul. I also want to plan to do more fun things during the week, like having people over for dinner, going out to eat, going to the movies, and other things that will break up the time. Sure, I have to get up early every day, and I have to follow the same routine, but if I limit work to even 9 hours/day, and I spend 11 sleeping, working out, getting ready and winding down, I still have 4 hours that I can use for me time.

I don't want to work for the weekends anymore. I want to start making each day a good one!

Self portrait

2009-11-09T10:39:00.000-08:00

Things are moving along with the TV show. I'm trying to get a TM on "choosing joy," but it may not be available, so I"m exploring other options - Joy is a Choice, etc... Kitty is working with me to register possible domain names that I may want, and she's also going to be working on the logo, etc...

It's just one of many projects that I have to do, but as my office gets closer and closer to being finished, I'm going to have more time and space to work on all of this...stuff!

Tomorrow, the closet should be finished, which means I can figure out what I need to store, what I need actively around me, and what additional desks/surfaces will fit with the closet installed. I can't wait to get my area organized again. It's making me crazy.

I hung my pictures this weekend, and the internet is set up with a temporary fix for now, but everything is still a mess, and I don't like it.

Tomorrow, after the closet is done, I'm going to do my best to get the office in order. I believe we are having company tomorrow night, so I'm not sure if I can fit it all in, but I'm going to try!

Choosing Joy - the show

2009-10-29T10:58:00.000-07:00

I needed to move on from Living Well. Kitty emailed me that there was a local station with a similar program, and it sounds like too many other things out there. My mind quickly went to Choosing Joy. I have the blog, I'm writing the book, and I'm trying my best to live the life.

I don't see why Choosing Joy can't encompass all the other things I mentioned, and then also have new components such as little tips on finding joy/choosing joy - things to be joyful about, etc...

Alison emailed me today suggesting that I do a show on Choosing Joy, so then I decided it's now a trend. Two of us thought of it, so now I'm posting it for the general public to weigh in on.

Yes, the general public of 4. Don't hate.

:)

What are your thoughts? Is it too cheesy?

Let me know!

Does this look like joy to you??

2009-10-27T13:43:00.000-07:00

Okay - DISCLAIMER: Not my actual home office, but not far either.

We have been having construction on my new home office, off and on, for the past 2 weeks. The upstairs is all torn apart, as is our bedroom that is home to overflow of stuff, and the downstairs is covered in tarps to protect from all the dust/junk from the project. It is a rather unsettling way to live.

I can't pay bills - I have no idea where they are. I am having trouble doing my homework, because I can't find my books. It's almost impossible to relax in this space, and I don't know how I thought adding this office was going to help me choose joy!

:)

I kid, but it has been a tough few weeks. As far as I know, they will be finishing the project today, except for building the closet which I will desperately need to get organized, but for now, I think I can manage. I am hoping Darcy can put most of humpty dumpty together without me, since I have a very busy week planned, but some stuff I will have to do myself, and I won't be able until Saturday. I can't wait to get organized!

I know I'm in the home stretch, but I can't wait for this to be done!

The set

2009-10-26T05:23:00.000-07:00

This is an example of a cooking show set. All I need to do is pick out some sets for my cooking segments, book club segments, interviews, etc... What fun! Darcy and I toured the station on Saturday, and it was really cool. I think the show is going to be called Living Well, but let me know what you think. I want to capture the idea of well rounded, healthy, local living. If you think of something better, or have comments on the name, let me know.

I left my sister a message asking her for help with a show title. I described the format: in these difficult times, I want to bring a show about healthy, inexpensive, well-rounded living - sometimes doing cooking segments, book clubs, exercise tips, features about local businesses and farms to support, restaurant reviews, interviews, etc... She called back and suggested I call the show, "The Oprah Winfrey Show, by Kristen Carroll." LOL!!! She is a funny girl.

All systems are a go. The first piece will be to film the intro and finalize the name. Then we'll put together a shooting schedule. I'm starting with a monthly show, and then if I have more time, I'll do it weekly. Although the show is monthly, I'll film weekly 5 minute segments to air during the daily "news," which will also be a promo for the show.

My plan is to block off a Saturday, and film 3 episodes at a time - that way there won't be a constant time commitment. For the intro, I'm thinking of a montage of local pictures, set to a theme song that I'll compose. Pretty simple. Let me know if you have other ideas. I plan to start filming in November.

I'm super excited, and I can't believe this didn't occur to me sooner!

Self portrait

2009-10-24T06:30:00.000-07:00

JK - That's about one fifth of me. :)

I was more referring to the nerd aspect...

This morning I put together a power point presentation to take to the cable station with me. I have drafted a mission statement, purpose, format, etc... I think we're in good shape.

I'm not sure how this works. I think I may need to find people to film and edit the show for me. Darcy can film it, and she can probably edit it too - I don't see why not. She's pretty good with technical stuff.

I have the time to put the show together and tape it, but I don't have the time to edit it, so hopefully we can figure that piece out when we meet today.

Inching closer into your living rooms!

2009-10-23T11:15:00.001-07:00

I have my first meeting with the local TV station tomorrow AM. They said my idea is very doable, and they are looking forward to getting started. Me too!! I'm tempted to fly my sister up to do the first cooking show with me. I think that would be a good thing.

Oh, Stephanie! You in??

:)

I think the prospect of having a healthy living TV show is very, very fun. It will also be just another venue to keep me on the straight and narrow with my own healthy living goals.

Move over Tyra, here I come! ;-)

KC - soon to be in your living room

2009-10-22T09:04:00.000-07:00

That's right, folks! I'm in the process of setting up a local cable access show. I find the idea *quite* humorous, and I think it would be a lot of fun too. The idea I've pitched is a Living Well/Choosing Joy show - either weekly or monthly. Sometimes it will be a healthy cooking show, other times it will be a book club, sometimes it will be a local restaurant review, maybe even a local guide for fun things to do in the area...possibly an art show...possibly a panel show to talk about local issues, etc...

I can't wait to hear back from them, and I will keep you posted!

Breast Cancer Walk

2009-10-21T05:13:00.000-07:00

The tool bar at the top of this blog window isn't populating, so no picture - sorry! Imagine this: a gray, rainy day, a large crowd of people with red cheeks and noses traipsing up a medium incline hill, smatterings of umbrellas and few smiles to be seen: that is what the breast cancer walk looked like this past Sunday. LOL

It was 30 something degrees out, but with the wind chill factor it felt much colder. We tried to avoid the large puddles as much as possible, but some could not be avoided, so our feet were wet, our ears were burning cold, our clothes were soaked, our lungs were hard to fill from the cold and of course, it was worth every minute.

We ended up doing the 3 mile walk, rather than the 5 mile walk we had planned on, since it was so cold and rainy. I hope none of my sponsors mind! As I walked, I thought about all the people I know who have been touched by breast cancer.

One friend of ours from Goffstown had quite an episode with breast cancer in her 20's, and now, 15 years later, she is having a severe relapse. Tomorrow, she is having a double mastectomy, and after that, she faces an aggressive regimin of chemo and radiation. I just learned about her relapse the day before the walk, so she was most on my mind on Sunday.

We have made great strides to fight breast cancer, but the work is not yet done, by a long shot. It's just one of so many battles we face, but since I'm not gifted with a scientific mind to personally find cures, I can give of my time and my resources to try to help out in the little way that I can. I can also choose to live a healthy life, and work to honor my body.

I would still like to do the breast cancer 3 day walk, and I'm thinking that next year may be the year.

Quality, Comfort and Price...That's Nice!

2009-10-12T06:05:00.000-07:00

I made my first Bernie and Phyl's furniture purchase yesterday. We are redoing the upstairs, and in our new TV nook, we won't have a ton of room, so we decided to get theater seating. LOL - yesterday, we bought 2 of the very obnoxious chairs pictured above. Let me tell you, they are SUPER comfortable, and it's a motorized recliner...with 2 cupholders! We didn't get the wedge between the 2 chairs because they will be separate, but if we change our minds, it's only $200 more, and it has a cooler in it. LOL - how funny.

I can't wait to have my sweet set up, and I think I'm going to paint a red accent wall, and hang movie theater posters on it to go with the theme!

Today, Raul is building the 3rd bedroom, which will have storage built in (hallelujah!), and I'll have plenty of surfaces for my computers and keyboard. It's all coming together!

Dress for Success

2009-10-06T05:38:00.000-07:00

I was driving to work this morning, and the sun was out, the leaves were changing colors, and overall, I finally felt (almost) like I imagine people in the movies do when they are driving to work in a good mood with the sun out, listening to tunes...I also romanticize about how nice it must be to head to work in such an upbeat way.

In New England, it's usually either dark, rainy, foggy or snowy on the way to work. Sunny mornings are not always the usher to our workplaces, and they cannot be taken for granted. I was thinking that the one thing that would make my experience totally movie fabulous was if I liked my outfit.

Since I lost a bunch of weight and I was only working in an office a few days a week, I don't have enough clothes in the rotation. Also, I'm really sick of a lot of them, and some of the clothes I wear are just plain ugly, such as the outfit I have on today. I look like a librarian, and I'm so *not* a librarian...I hardly know how to read.

I *hate* to buy clothes now while I'm losing, but I'm thinking of getting a few new jackets that I can coordinate with dress pants and shirts I already have. If I buy jackets just a little on the small side, I should be able to get 6 months use out of them, and as long as I buy them on sale, that's good enough for me.

Liking the way you look is very central to feeling good about yourself, and of course, choosing joy. I make sure my face and hair looks good each day, and I should take more caution with the rest of the package. I just ordered a few new things online, and it's a start. I can't buy a new wardrobe today on a whim...can I? ;-)

I can't wait until the day when I can fit into exactly whatever I want to wear, and I don't have to buy clothing that I know is only going to be temporary. That will be a great day!

Making a house a home

2009-10-05T07:30:00.000-07:00

I've always moved around... a lot. I averaged one move per year since I was 18 until a few years ago. I've lived at my current house for almost 3 years - quite a record for me. I do have flights of fancy, and if the market were different, I probably would have sold the 2 housed and moved into one really nice house (that was still cheaper than the 2 separate houses), but I'm stuck.

When I moved into the house in Lynn, we worked really hard to upgrade the place, and we spent time giving thought to decorating. People would tell us it was a cozy place, and I liked that. When we moved into the house in NH, it was already furnished, so we moved in with our suitcases and that was that.

It was a weekend/summer home, so we put up with the inconveniences that came along with moving into, basically, someone else's home. The owner before had used the home for a tryst of his, and while I gain amusement from that scenario, I gain no functionality in the house at all. When we moved in, the only full bath was off the master bedroom upstairs - completely insane.

There is absolutely *no* storage, and it's not practical as a full time home, which it has turned into for us. Despite how much I love living on the water, and I love the proximity to the big city (LOL), I have never thought of this place as a long term home for me. It's filled with furniture that someone else bought, and it's just not designed to be a full time home.

I often have the desire to move. I feel like this housing crisis is holding me back, but really, what else would I be doing? Yes, I'd love to have a home in Florida or somewhere warm, but that can wait until I'm more financially stable. I think I need to embrace the fact that I'm going to be "stuck" here for a while, and I need to make my house a home.

I've started making it more functional, by adding the shower and a full size washer and dryer in the downstairs bathroom, and next weekend, we're starting work on the 3rd bedroom that will also be my (much larger) office, that I so desperately need.

Over the weekend, I ordered a couple new TVs for the place, and a stereo system for downstairs. Next, I'm going to see if my dear friend Karen wants a job painting. We need to make it ours, both in functionality and style. Perhaps if I feel like the house is a candidate for long term living, I won't be so tempted to want to move.

It really is a beautiful house, and I'm blessed to have it. Now, I just need to make it a home.

Peace of mind

2009-10-02T05:22:00.000-07:00

There is never enough time. The only time I take to rest (usually) is when I don't feel well. I don't know how other people have time to argue with Amazon.com about incorrect charges - I end up kissing the $600 goodbye, because who has the time?? Who has the time to read their mail? I can't imagine. Seriously.

I have taken on a bit much, as usual, and my first step in clearing the insanity away is getting more organized at home. I need a bigger office. I have sooooo many projects I'm working on, in addition to the jobs, school work, bible study, lake association, etc..., and I need space for all of them.

I am a creative being, and my creativity gets stifled in all the clutter that I surround myself with - mentally and physically. My CD is being held up because there are a few administrative things I have to do on my end, and I just haven't had the chance to - who has the time?? :)

I just emailed TJ's awesome contractor, who I have used before, to see if he can come up here asap to build the 3rd bedroom/office for me. I have found someone to take the gargantuan entertainment center for free (a $4000 value - who has the time to sell it?), and all I need is a giant desk. Actually, I'm thinking of just having Raul (contractor) build me one for the room, but I'm open to his thoughts. He usually talks me out of my bad ideas.

The bedroom doesn't work for me either. The furniture is huge, but I still have way too much stuff for it. Maybe I should simplify, rather than buying more furniture. Yeah, probably. I suppose I don't need 500 hats and 3000 t shirts...don't get me started on the shoe problem.

I think part of mental health is a well organized house/life. I hope I am feeling up to the challenge to take on sorting out my clothes/house/life this weekend, so I'll be better prepared to fight Amazon.com, get my CD finalized (finally), and do the rest of the stuff I was put on this earth to do.

Choosing Joy

2009-09-28T07:47:00.001-07:00

TJ emailed me and said that I've been choosing joy less and less lately. LOL. That was a funny way to put it.

Just know, dear readers, that I am very much choosing joy still, even though I don't update my blog daily.

I just returned from a wonderful birthday weekend. It was so much fun, and the weather on Saturday was absolutely perfect.

Today I am dragging a bit, but it was worth it. :)

So happy birthday to me. I am now 33. Surely, I was supposed to be a grown up by now. Hmmm....

Thank you to everyone for my wonderful gifts, and calls, and good times. I am blessed.

I love weekends

2009-09-21T05:17:00.000-07:00

I really should give thought to saving money at some point in my life. That way I can have a glimmer of hope related to retirement. I love being able to do whatever I want with my time, even if that means working. I don't love following a schedule that it's exactly up to me. I've been back to a full time normal job for one week, and now I'm thinking of retirement. LOL.

Friday night we were both tired, so we just stayed in and had a quiet night of TV...very relaxing. Saturday, I got up at 6:30 and I came into the office and worked for 5 hours or so, and then I went home, worked on some grant applications for the lake association, did some homework, prepared for my Bible study, and by 4PM I was on the hammock reading my book. It was so relaxing just reading, knowing I had accomplished a ton, and just listening to the sounds the water makes, and silly boys in a canoe singing Janis Joplin songs.

Saturday night, we went for dinner at Stephanie and Carolyn's house, and it was fantastic.

Sunday, we had Bible study, then we went out for a phenomenal lunch at one of my favorite restaurants, followed by the movie "All About Steve" (adorable - LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Sandra Bullock)...when I got home, I read on the hammock for a while, and then I started making dinner, and reading while it cooked. I finished my good book (always feel a loss after that), and we had a very yummy dinner.

I watched TV for a little while, went to bed, and here I am. Tippy Tappy Typing my weekend update for you. LOL

I actually feel GREAT today. Not physically, I'm sore, and my allergies are bothering me, but mentally and emotionally, it's a great day. I'm so glad I got so much work done over the weekend, because I can enter the week ahead of the game.

I can accomplish a full week of work, spending 5 hours in the office when no one else is there. It's amazing. On the school front, I have all 100's so far, on my first 3 assignments/tests. I'm not focused on the grades that much, but it's nice to see the A's rolling in.

That's my update. I'm continuing to actively choose joy in my life, and I'm loving it.

How are you?? :)

I like my job

2009-09-16T08:46:00.000-07:00

Howdy. I'm 3 days into my new full time role, and I am really enjoying it so far. I regret that I haven't had as much time to spend on it as I've wanted to, due to other commitments, but I'm going to do my best to free up my schedule next week. Also, I'm going to come in on Saturday to plow through a bunch of things.

I'm working on so many projects that I'm excited about, and I only wish I had more time to get them all done asap, but I suppose I shouldn't work myself out of a job just yet... ;-)

HOLLYWOOD!! (Florida, that is)

2009-09-10T15:10:00.001-07:00

Well friends, once again I'm writing to say how tough life has been lately.

No, that sounds snotty. I'm not snotty. I'm just happy and very blessed...and one of the few people who will drop everything and prepare a speech at the last minute to fill in when there's been a cancellation...so there's that...it's not all just good fortune.

There are a few different pools to choose from at the *amazing* resort we are staying at (for free). This one is totally cool in that the water goes over the top of the stone that you can see, and drips down the side, which then funnels and flows into a fountain into a giant pool/lagoon at the level below. This pool also has a large glass circle in the middle of the floor so you can see down to the pool below. Also, when you're in the pool below looking up at the people through the glass circle, it looks like you are checking out humans at an aquarium. Very funny/cool.

They sky was amazing and about 12 different blues today. I need a better camera.

Hi!

This is the "endless" flowing pool I told you about earlier.

Those are all pictures from the vast, gorgeous lobby.

Why doesn't anyone want to sit next to me on the plane??

LOL. We're having a great time. I worked for most of the morning, and I finished my presentation as well. I also did a dry run through, and I feel very comfortable with it. I'm actually looking forward to presenting tomorrow. That's a nice feeling. I remember when I wasn't so nuts about presenting.

Tonight we are going to checkout the Hollywood Boardwalk, which I blogged about this past January (http://phatband.blogspot.com/2009/01/beautiful-goodbye.html) We loved Hollywood, and we're so happy to be back so soon!

Going back into an office full time is going to be an adjustment, but I certainly went out with a bang. (Looking forward to going to the cape in 2 weeks!) :)

Be well.

Jamaaaaaica

2009-09-02T15:46:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure why I haven't yet retired to an island yet...what am I waiting for? Why isn't this a more immediate goal of mine? I'm not sure. :)

I'd like to live on an island, painting, composing, singing, swimming, boating and the like. Is that too much to ask? I don't see why. We can do whatever we want in life. It's probably a good thing (for my career) that I'm saddled with 2 mortgages right now, or else I would consider becoming a poor artist...even if it was just for a while...

We had a wonderful time in Jamaica. The resort was beautiful, the water was amazing, the sights we saw were so unique... Other than being ripped off by every local I met, I have absolutely no complaints.

The food wasn't great, actually, but I wasn't expecting it to be. It was an all inclusive resort, so it is what it is... it was fine, though. It was just as I expected, so I wasn't let down or delightfully surprised.

I loved the glass bottom boat - we were way out, and the water was so clear, you could see 30 and even 60 feet down! I saw lots of cool coral, fish, an octopus and even a shipwreck! We went into one of the poor villages nearby, and I couldn't believe the poverty. They didn't even really have walls to their houses, and certainly no running water or electricity.

We toured a nearby farm as well - that was really neat. I'll post more pictures later. We asked our driver to take us to local places, avoiding tourist traps, and he did a great job of that. I know it was sketchy going off with a strange man with no cell service, but he was old, I suspected diabetic, and I knew I could take him. :) As it turns out, he was very nice and he says we'll be friends for life now. Very cute. He wants me to send him a copy of my CD as soon as possible, and that he's going to go to the post office every day until it arrives.

Darcy didn't want to leave, but I was ready. I missed my Henry, and I wanted to have some time back home to recoup before going back to work (in an office) full time next week. It will be an adjustment.

That's all for now!

New Red Neck Fun for Me!

2009-08-23T12:33:00.000-07:00

Darcy, Henry and I went off roading in the golf cart today. LOL. It was SO MUCH FUN!! We are such rednecks, I know, but I don't care. It's a blast.

There are all these trails near our house where four wheelers go, and there are bumps and hills and places where you can drive up almost sideways. I was impressed how well the golf cart handled it all!

Off roading tires will be our next purchase. Too funny.

Thou shalt not covet

2009-08-21T05:11:00.000-07:00

TJ is going to Bermuda next week, and I'm extremely jealous! I've never been, and I've heard it's fabulous!

I am taking the first week of September off for vacation, and that should be nice. I thought of going to the Cape or the Hamptons, but I've decided to stay home. I've traveled a lot this year, and because the summer and weather have been so strange, I really haven't had a chance to enjoy my own waterfront home.

I also have a ton I want to get done before returning to a full time, office bound job. I will definitely make time to relax, though. That's for sure.

My parents are heading to Hilton Head next week, also a wonderful vacation. They are celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. Congratulations, you crazy kids!

I suppose I shouldn't feel too bad about my staycation since I'm heading to Italy in 2 months. !

Just say no

2009-08-19T05:28:00.001-07:00

Once again, I've decided there's WAY too much television watching in my life. I know you may wonder how that's possible since I'm so busy, but trust me, it's possible. At night when I'm working, often I'll sit in front of the TV and work with the TV on in the background. As soon as I decide I finally need to veg out at the end of the day, I plop myself in front of the television.

I've lost entire days, just gazing into that silly little machine. It's crazy, and it needs to stop. There's hardly anything good on right now (except for SHO/HBO!!), so this is a good time to take a break. I'm going to try to greatly reduce the amount of time I spent in front of the TV.

I tried it last night, and believe me, it's way more enjoyable relaxing on a hammock, reading a book, than sitting in a hot house in front of a lame TV show...in a chair that's practically conformed to my every bump and curve.

I think TV can be quite entertaining, but right now, it's just not adding to my overall quality of life in anyway, so that's that.

A Celebration of Life

2009-08-18T05:54:00.001-07:00

On Sunday we celebrated Sally's life. Some of the pictures above, begin to capture the beauty of the day, but they don't do it justice. I should have taken more after all the flowers, tables and decorations were set up. At least I have a lot of it on video.

The bench above was built, painted and donated by some neighbors on the river...so sweet...Sally loved to garden, and this bench will set in her garden at her house. Lanie made the seed packets that are placed on the bench, so that we could all plant wildflowers, Sally's favorite, in our own gardens as a tribute...

Amanda loaned us her memory tree, that's on one of the tables above, so that we could all write messages to Sally and her loved ones, placing them on the branches of the tree, and then given to the family.

Lanie and Amanda donated all the beautiful flowers, and there were TONS. It was really wonderful to see so many people get together to help plan, and give of their time and money freely to make Sunday a beautiful day.

I can't help but think what a shame it is that we do these things after people have gone...

My parents used to throw spontaneous love parties for us when we were growing up, and we could throw love parties for our Mom and Dad too. It was just a party in your honor, with your favorite food, games, and some fun presents...just because! I love that idea, and while my friends would probably commit me if I tried something like that now, I think we can at least learn from the principle...

You never need an excuse to show someone how much they mean to you. I'm going to continue to try to do a better job of that.

Wow - I missed a whole week?!

2009-08-11T05:11:00.000-07:00

The picture above is Fiji. When I couldn't fall asleep last night, I was picturing vacationing in a hut in Fiji. That would be nice. Do you have any idea how expensive it is to rent one of those huts? It's crazy. I'm sure it's worth it too.

I could never justify spending the money, so I've found cheaper huts in still beautiful locations (just not Fiji) where you can stay in a hut over the water with a glass bottom floor for like $300 or $400/night. It's still a lot of money, but at least it's not monopoly money like the Fiji huts.

I need a vacation. I'm working two full time jobs, while I film a documentary and get my CD going. When anything extra comes up, all bets are off. We're having the memorial for Sally at our house and Krissy's house this weekend. It's turning out to be a lot of work, which I'm more than happy to do, but it's just hard to find the time.

It makes sleeping a challenge because I never feel like I've taken care of everything I'm supposed to. I think if I take a vacation, I'll probably just use it to work on other things, but I'm still thinking of taking the first week in September off, and possibly the last week in August. We'll see.

TJ thinks I can't be happy unless I'm going in a million directions...maybe he's right, but I think it's also just that I have so much I want to do - how can I possibly pair down the list more? I've already put so many things on hold.

This is what happens when you lose your job. You remember all the other things you wanted to do with your life, and you have the freedom and flexibility to just go for it.

Hopefully when I start my full time job in September, I can go back to my life of quiet desperation. ;-)

Day off

2009-08-03T06:27:00.001-07:00

Even though I had a million things to do, I decided to take the day off yesterday. I had such a busy week, by the time Saturday came around, I was completely exhausted. I was out with friends until almost midnight for a birthday celebration the night before, and I had to be out of the house by 7:30 AM Saturday morning. I didn't sleep well Friday night, so by the time 6AM came on Saturday morning, I was TIred.

I had many stops along the way, and I didn't get home until around 11 on Saturday night. I can't believe I made it that long. When I got up yesterday, I spent about 5 hours sorting through things I'd picked up at the house in MA the day before, looking for pictures, things for my documentary. It was something that needed to be done, but it was relaxing, so at least the day wasn't a total waste.

Other than that, I moved out of my office in Manch., and we went to the movies. At home, I watched tv and ate junky food, so I have a food hangover today, and I feel gross, but at least I'm well rested!

I've been cruising along with my work all morning, and I know I'll get more done this week since I took a day off

...........

2009-07-31T04:22:00.000-07:00

This is a picture from one of our lake web sites. It's technically a dammed up lake, created from a river. We locals still affectionately refer to it as the rivah/river, depending on where we're from. The river is a community, our own little dysfunctional family. There's quite a spectrum of people from the lifers to the slumming yuppies to the rather colorful characters, and a whole cast and crew.

We all know each other, and we all care about each other, and we all get annoyed with each other from time to time. Sometimes it's like living in a fishbowl, but as I've talked about so many times before, these people are family. If anyone ever needs anything, these neighbors and this family is there for you - without even giving it a second thought - just as if you had known them all your life.

Yesterday, a member of our river family passed away. She was young, and it was very unexpected, and we're all profoundly sad by this loss. I know she had been going through a rough time lately, and it is devastating for me to think about how she probably never would have known how much of a loss her passing created, and how many people loved her.

It makes me think about how easy it is to take people for granted in life - assuming they'll always be there. We can't go through life with kid gloves on, worried that everyone around us is frail, but we, or at least I, can do a better job of letting the people in my life know that I love them. ...taking it easier on people, being a better listener, and trying to bring joy into the lives of the people we love, and the people we don't yet know...

I try to bring joy into the lives of the people I know, but I have room for improvement. I know that what I'm taking away from this tragedy doesn't even remotely compensate, but I do try to be introspective in times like these, and in the spirit of self awareness and self improvement, I'm taking away a renewed desire to share joy and happiness, to be more present with people, and the reminder to tell my loved ones that I love them.

So loved ones, you know who you are, I love you!

Be well today. Each day is a gift.

So far, so good

2009-07-30T08:28:00.000-07:00

I'm having a really good week. I love the work I'm doing for our new client, and I love working with an organization with such a wonderful and altruistic mission. I'm such a bleeding heart, it's true.

My parents tried to return me when they realized what a little liberal I was becoming as a young adult but it was too late. ;-) You're all stuck with me!

Anyway, I'm loving the work, and even though I've been extremely busy, I've had a great feeling of accomplishment, and I've been learning a lot too.

I ended up working from home yesterday, and I'll spend Friday in the office. It was a good thing I did because I never would have made it through the volume of work I had to do with the usual office distractions. I always find it odd that I can get so much more work done at home, as opposed to at work.

Our house is kind of hot. None of the AC's work very well, and by 10AM yesterday, I was getting quite lethargic from the heat. It was no problem, though. I put on my swim trunks and ran outside and jumped into the water!

Well, not exactly...but that's how I envisioned it happening. In all actuality, with my bum knee, I hobbled down the walkway into the water, but once in, I totally jumped off of one foot. Henry joined me, and it was FUN.

I was only in the water for a few minutes, but I went back up to my office and worked in my wet trunks and t shirt for the next few hours. It cooled me right off! When I got hot again in the afternoon, I did it again.

I'm in my very warm office today, and I'm really wishing there was some sort of dunk tank here.

It's occurring to me now that Alison's pool is only about 5 minutes from here. I think I'm going to do some lunchtime swimming next week if it's still this hot. I hate to take a break for lunch, but if I'm hot, I'm going to. I get more done if I'm not melting into my chair.

Oh! Also good news, my boat is fixed, and I think I'm going to have it back tonight! It was only $300 or so to fix it, and that's a relief. I hope it's all set for the rest of the year, because I'm ready to do some yachting! ;-)

We have plans to meet up with friends later tonight, but if I have my boat and it's sunny out, I'll be on the water! I think it's time for me to take a night off from work....although I need to check my Friday deadlines first!

On the health front, I think my eye is getting better. My knee is very slowly getting better. I hope it's fixed in 2 more weeks.

I hope you are all well!

Using Facebook for Good

2009-07-30T08:10:00.000-07:00

As my dear friends know, I don't use facebook for social purposes. That's way too much personal information to put out there. Me? I just pour my heart out into 11 carefully crafted blogs. LOL3

Anyway, I don't use facebook (other than for work), so all you facebook users, which is basically EVERYONE ELSE in the world, please do me a solid.

I want to get 100 responses to my healthy living habits survey. The responses are still trickling in, but I think I still need about 40 more to reach 100. Will you please post a link to my survey on your wall?Come on, all the cool kids are doing it.

Here's the survey link: http://www.zoomerang.com/Survey/survey-intro.zgi?p=WEB229B23QZ9QJ

THANK YOU!!!

(And yes, to my most loyal readers who noticed, I did post this same post on 2 blogs. That just means I really mean it. :))

I'll sleep when I'm dead

2009-07-28T04:30:00.000-07:00

Tom and I landed a new client yesterday. They are a really great organization, and I'm really looking forward to being a part of their foundation. They basically need an entire HR function set into place for them, and they are a global company, so this will be a fun challenge.

As my loyal readers know, I'm already quite busy with my current work and project load, but I will find the time to squeeze this in. They have some very aggressive deadlines, and Tom and I have 2 weeks to accomplish a big portion of the work they need done.

I anticipate very long hours, but I'm going to try to make it as fun as possible - working outside or out of restaurants/cafe's... Between my full time gig and this, I won't be surprised if I need to put in 80 hrs/week for the next few weeks, so I'll need to change up my scenery.

Today I'll spend 10 hrs on site working for one client, and tonight I'll work 4-5 hrs outside by the water, where the waitstaff (aka - the Darce) at 11 AH will attend to my every need. LOL. See - I have it all worked out. ;-)

Photo shoot - by popular demand :)

2009-07-27T18:46:00.000-07:00

They took over 1,000 photos - Kitty was kind enough to narrow them down to 150 for me to choose from - here are about 10 for my fans. (LOL)

Putting on a happy face

2009-07-23T04:41:00.001-07:00

LOL

So yesterday I was feeling slightly miserable between the exhaustion, 3 day headache, knee and eye issues, and rain, but I had blogged about trying to make the best of the day...putting on a happy face...choosing joy over misery...

I did my best, and I ended up having a perfectly fine day. I made sure I took a few moments to laugh with people in the office, I focused on the positive, I avoided situations where I would hurt my knee more (which I should have been doing all along - I'm stupit), and so yes, my day was perfectly fine. It wasn't a great day or an awesome day - it was just a normal day.

I think we control so much of our outlook in life. Somethings and some emotions may be out of our control, but the way we handle and respond to things makes the difference in our journey. I always hear the phrase, "It's not the destination, it's the journey." I don't know who said it - I've seen it attributed to many different people, but the point is so true.

So many times we are just waiting out our current situation, hoping to get to our goal because then we'll be happy or comfortable or satisfied or rich or whatever it is we're looking for. If we can realize that each step along our journey is truly part of what "it" is all about, we will be more inclined to focus on making each day count.

Today is a new day. I'm pretty sure it's a cloudy day. I would prefer a sunny day, but a cloudy day is better than a rainy day. I have someone coming to take my boat out of the water, and he's going to try to fix it today. He can do that on a cloudy day, but not so much on a rainy day. I'm hoping he can fix it today or tomorrow because it's supposed to be sunny this weekend, so it would be fixed just in time.

Sometimes when I'm sick of being stuck in the house, or I'm sick of the rain, Darcy and I have theme nights to try to change it up. We don't do it as often as we used to, but we may have Chinese night where we order or make Chinese food and have Chinese drinks and play Chinese games, or we'll just have a game night or a monte carlo night or just something to change it up to make an overcast blah Thursday night a fun night. We always have a blast, and I think tonight is going to be a theme night. It's been yucky all week (again), and I've been tired - we've both had headache's all week, and I think this is just the thing to change it up and to spike the blah with a little fun.

I better give Darcy some notice so she can get Henry the appropriate attire! ;-)

LOL - enjoy your day, be it sunny or gray.

You go, Manchvegas!

2009-07-22T09:18:00.000-07:00

Forbes Magazine just named Manchester, NH the cheapest place to live in the US! Well, not exactly... They rated Manchester, NH the *best* cheap city to live in, in the US. You can read the full story here.

The honor was bestowed upon us based on the following criteria: low crime rate, best employment opportunities and best over all quality of life. Booyah! Oh yeah, and we don't have any sales or income tax!

Take that TJ - maybe flannel isn't so bad after all??!!

LOL

I think Forbes figured out something I've known for a long time. Manchester has great restaurants, great sports teams, a lively downtown, super easy accessibility to Boston, the White Mountains and the ocean, plenty of entertainment, and you don't stick out if you're a bit overweight. ;-)

Can't you just feel my Manchester Pride??!!!

Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down

2009-07-22T05:16:00.000-07:00

You kids are probably too young to remember the Carpenters, and their songs.

It's a rainy day...I'm exhausted - I was in the office from 7-5 yesterday, and then I had to rush home, get changed, eat dinner, and head over to a ball game for work. I didn't get home until 10. Normally, that wouldn't be too much of a challenge for me, but I'm still recovering from pneumonia so I need a lot more rest than usual.

So yes, it's rainy, I'm tired, my knee hurts, my eye is bothering me, I've had a headache for 2 days, and I have a ton of work to do, yet all I want to do is curl up on the couch and watch tv with my puppy.

No such luck!

LOL.

I'm going to do my best to choose joy today. I'm going to think positive, make the best of my situation, and I'm going to choose to have a great day. :)

I'll let you know how that goes.

I love summer

2009-07-18T16:55:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon we had friends over, and we paddled over to cupcake island since the boat hasn't been fixed yet. We had such a nice time, and I can't believe it was the first day we'd been out there since 2 months ago.

I had a blast, and I want to make sure we get back out there soon!

Tomorrow morning, we are heading out to the ocean for my photo shoot...at 4:30 AM! It's for my CD cover, and we're going to be there for the sunrise. Kitty took care of all of the details, but it was a last minute arrangement, so I'm not extremely prepared.

I'm very glad to have this scheduled, because that's the last piece (aside from the CD cover art/design that Kitty will do once the photo shoot has been completed) that I need to do before I can order copies of the CD. I had been too sick to do it sooner.

Darcy and I will be getting up at 3AM to have time to get ready and get to the ocean for 4:30. I hope I wake up when the alarm goes off! The life of a rock star is quite challenging! ;-)

Back to Work

2009-07-14T14:39:00.001-07:00

I've been so busy with everything else, I don't think I mentioned to the blogosphere yet that I accepted a full time job with one of my clients...about a month ago... While I wind down some other projects I'm working on, I'm going to be going into the office Tuesdays through Thursdays during the summer, and then I'll start full time after Labor Day. I can still keep my consulting business as well, so it's a good situation.

I'd been working 40 hrs/week for them for a long time anyway, and this way I get benefits and more job security, but the content of the work will be pretty much the same, so I'm excited for the opportunity. The job is an expanded role from my last full time job, and it's exactly what I would have picked as my next step in my career, so good for me.

I started my weekly schedule in the office today. I wasn't sure how I'd feel about going back to a normal office schedule (even though it's only 3 days a week now!) since I hadn't had a normal office schedule in so long. Even in my last job before I was laid off, I had the flexibility to work from home quite often. I haven't had a job that required me to be in the same office every day for probably about 5 years. Boy, was I spoiled!

My first day back in the office went really well! I was very busy, and booked solid almost every minute, but it made the time fly by. I really like the people I work with, so that's always a huge plus. Also, the commute is the shortest commute I've ever had in my entire life.

Cheers to new beginnings!

www.kcsings.com

2009-07-13T12:32:00.000-07:00

I uploaded one of my songs to my website, if you want to check it out. Don't forget to sign my guestbook. :)

A beautiful thing

2009-07-12T10:46:00.000-07:00

Amanda and Nick had an absolutely beautiful weekend for their absolutely beautiful wedding. We had such a nice time, and I'm so very happy for them.

Here is Amanda and her dad walking down the aisle:

The very handsome Nick waiting for his beautiful bride:

The scene below was the best part of the wedding, in my book... Amanda has an adorable five (?) year old daughter who Nick has loved as his own since they've been together. He is so good with her, and she adores him completely. After Nick and Amanda said their vows to each other and exchanged rings, Nick got down on his knee and read his vows to Alex, promising to be a good Daddy for her, and supporting her, etc..., and then he gave her a ring joining them all together as a family. There was not a dry eye in the place. It was the sweetest thing I've ever seen, and Nick's dance with little Alex was a close second.The happy family after the ceremony:

Amanda does floral designs for weddings as her career, and the flowers at this wedding were UN believable. I left my camera in Lanie and Billy's room after the service, but I'm hoping Lanie will share her pictures with me, so I can post the flowers. They were almost as stunning as the bride. :)

I told Darcy today that whoever invites us to their wedding next is going to have some *pretty* big shoes to fill. LOL - the weekend was beautiful and wonderful, and the food was fantastic - everyone had a great time, and we wish this happy family the very best that their life and love will offer them.

Big XO.

Weekend Away

2009-07-09T19:33:00.000-07:00

Our friend's Nick and Amanda are getting married on Southport Island, ME this weekend. We rented out a little cottage in nearby Boothbay Harbor, and it's pet friendly, so our darling little Henwy will be joining us.

Tomorrow night is an outdoor lobster/clambake thing by the ocean, and later on there'll be a fire. I'm hoping to feel well enough to hang out with everyone for a while, but I'm nervous to be near the coast at night while I'm still recovering from pneumonia. I'm going to bring lots of layers!

The wedding will be outside on Saturday. I'm *so* glad the weather is supposed to be nice. They are an adorable, loving couple, and I'm really happy that everything is working out well for them! They each deserve a wonderful wedding, and a long lasting love. They are very good kids.

I'm hoping the sun will dry out my congested chest tomorrow while I lay out by the pool at our resort!

A good thing

2009-07-08T17:25:00.000-07:00

I bought a pair of plaid shorts at Old Navy when I was in Nashville. When I wore them for the first time, I realized they were actually reversible. Cool! I know that reversible shorts are kind of dorky, but for someone who travels frequently, and only brings one carry on suitcase, reversible clothing could open up a whole new world for me. ;-)

Art Project

2009-07-08T13:04:00.000-07:00

We had the downstairs bathroom redone while we were away, and now we need stuff to decorate it with. Since we've been sick, we haven't left the house to get the stuff we need. I decided to paint a wall hanging today (pictured above).

I need to paint the border another color, because that is just entirely TOO much blue. I asked Darcy what she thought of the painting, and she did her best to convince me that she liked it, but I could tell otherwise! LOL

Oh well - I'm certainly not married to it, and obviously, it only took me a few minutes to do, so I may redo it another day when I'm feeling better. All I did was a little painting, but it sucked the LIFE out of me because of my pneumonia.

We left the house to go out to lunch with Lanie today. I knew I had to try to venture out in the world since I hadn't since last Thursday. My lunch made me a little sick to my stomach, and I got home just in time. This has been a heck of a run, my friends. :) (Shouldn't I be losing more weight than just a few lbs??? That's the whole *point* of looking forward to a stomach flu!) LOL

Anyway, I am ca-raving a nice meat and potatoes home cooked meal with rolls and gravy. I can't remember the last time I had that - actually - I think it was 3 months ago for Darcy's birthday. It's very rare we make a big, filling meal like that, but I'm due. Too bad the 2 cooks in the house are too sick to cook.

Oh, Heeeeeeenry!!!! JK - he's still recovering too!

I think tomorrow when I'm feeling better (fingers crossed) I'm going to go to the store and get stuff for a roast beef dinner. Yum. :)

Just another day in my hood

2009-07-06T09:04:00.001-07:00

Making a movie

2009-07-02T11:40:00.000-07:00

Well, I recorded a CD, so why not make a movie? LOL - I'm doing a documentary about my experience recording a CD, and I'm so very blessed and lucky to have a friend who happens to be an emmy nominated film producer - helping me tremendously. We don't know each other that well, and it's so generous of him to help!

I didn't even know what program to start with, and he told me what I suspected - anything worthwhile would need to be done on a Mac. Soooo, not wasting anytime, natch, I bought an iMac this morning. The thing is SO cool. I know I'm going to be a huge Mac fan...I held out for so long because of the money, but I got a super good deal on a floor model.

This should be a really neat experience. When I'm done, if it's any good, he's going to help me shop it around to film festivals and HBO/Showtime, etc... COOL!

Follow Your Dreams

2009-06-30T03:58:00.001-07:00

It's funny to think that a dream I had a few months ago has already come to fruition. It wasn't magic - I just decided to do it, and I did it. It can be easy to dream big, but never follow through. Sometimes we have to go beyond our comfort zone if we want to do something different, and that's okay.

It's not the destination, it's the journey. We can't always sit around waiting for circumstances to be perfect before we do the things we're holding out for. I'm making a documentary of my experience here. I'd love to wait to be thin before submitting a documentary filled with footage of me to a TV station, but too bad. I'm not thin. I hope to be, and I'm going to work toward that, but I'm not going to waste another minute of life holding myself back from doing what I want to do because of obstacles I'm creating. I did that for a decade when I was bigger, and I'm not doing it anymore.

I have no idea what will come of this CD. I don't expect much, but I know what has already come of the experience. I got to see the inner workings of a real studio, I have a CD that came out much better than I anticipated, I followed my dreams and had an extraordinary life experience, and now I have direction on my next project - a rap cd! :) If any more comes out of the experience, it's all gravy at this point.

I truly believe that we can do whatever we want in this world. So much of success is just luck, but I don't need to sell a ton of copies of my CD to have it be a meaningful experience - it already was a meaningful, life changing experience. I'm so glad I followed my dream.

What are your dreams???

Since I'm a recording artist, I need a web site! ;-)

2009-06-25T11:36:00.000-07:00

http://www.kcsings.com/

It's a work in progress, but sign up for my mailing list!

Recording a CD blog

2009-06-21T20:53:00.000-07:00

www.recordingacd.blogspot.com

Blogger is going to shut down my account soon if I don't stop creating new blogs. LOL - I decided that while I'm here, I'll have a lot to say about recording the CD, so I started a new blog. Feel free to check it out. :)

KC & D in Nashville, courtesy of my YouCam

2009-06-21T12:03:00.000-07:00

(Krissy, if you see this, please show Henry, so he knows we're thinking of him. LOL)

Greetings, Earthlings.

2009-06-21T07:54:00.000-07:00

Hello, from me and my extremely large head! Darcy took this picture at Logan, when we were waiting to board. We had a connecting flight in Charlotte, and we had to run from one end of the airport to the other to get to our flight on time. Good thing we're skinny! LOL

Everyone in Nashville is ridiculously nice. They put their arms around you at random, and they are a very "hands on" people. haha - I don't mind.

I love it here. We had a great dinner at some steak house last night, and then we checked out the area around us. It was fun, and I'm looking forward to seeing more of the city! I'll try to take more pictures to post, so you won't need to stare at the extreme close up of my face.

Happy Father's Day to all the good Dads out there...especially to mine! :) I love you!

Oh! On the CD front - yesterday I decided I want to rearrange some of the songs...put my own spin on it. I should have thought of this before, but I didn't, so oh well. I'm done with 3 of them, plus I know I don't want to change another 2 of them, but today I want to get through the other 7.

I wasn't able to download different versions to my iPod since my connection was so slow, so rather than being influenced by other artists, I will influence myself. I didn't know I'd have a bit of a flair for arranging music, but I kind of like some of the things I've done so far, and Darcy thinks they are fantastic. She may be slightly biased.

I'll try to post something on this blog for you to hear.

Okay - heading to the pool. See you soon. XO

Clay Aiken

2009-06-20T05:27:00.000-07:00

Seeing as though I have to start recording in 2 days, I thought I ought to get around to thinking about a flow and theme and sound for my CD. I have only practiced formally about 3 (maybe 4) times, but I have tried to sing in the car, and while kayaking, etc...not enough by any means, but I'm busy!

I know the songs, and I'm hoping I'll get direction from the producer. When I looked at the songs I had chosen (half due to the fact I could get copyrights easily for, and not necessarily what I would have picked if I had more time), it was clear that I have the potential to put a soulful, gospel style CD together, so that's the theme I'm going for.

As far as the sound, without realizing it, I think I'm envisioning a kind of Clay Aiken feel for the whole thing. One of my favorite songs to listen and sing to is his version of _Bridge over Troubled Water_ that he sang with the gospel choir on American Idol. I think he as an amazing, powerful and beautiful voice. I want to be just like him. :)

Well, at least I set the bar low. Oy. Hey - it doesn't hurt to be inspired by people who are really good at what they do. After all, if you aim for nothing, that's what you'll hit.

I'm downloading 2-4 versions of all of the songs I'm singing to my iPod to listen to on the plane. Partly so I can learn them and partly to get ideas of what sounds good for the songs.

For the first time since I booked this trip, I'm starting to see it all as reality. I am going to be in a studio with a producer, and a band and back up singers, etc...in 2 days...recording a CD. That's a very interesting scenario.

I haven't even sang in ages, and although I've always loved singing, I really didn't think I'd be recording a CD in a professional studio, but I am. I think it's something I've always wanted to do deep down, and I could put it off until I'm formally trained, and when I've had lots of time to pick out the perfect songs, and all that, but knowing me, that day would never happen.

If it weren't for spontaneity, I'd probably never accomplish anything. I have very little time for planning, and I hope that doesn't hold me back.

See you soon.

My big fat checklist

2009-06-19T04:40:00.000-07:00

I have a LOT to do before leaving for Nashville tomorrow, but I'm well on my way. I've been up since 5:15, and I've already completed about 25% of my checklist for the day. If you aren't a list maker, I recommend you become one immediately. :)

For me, at least, it's the difference between chaos and organization. I love my lists, and I live by them...I even just love the satisfaction I get from crossing things off the list. What fun.

Thankfully, I delivered my keynote speech last night without a hitch. I wish I had more time to prepare it, but I didn't, and it was fine. I received extremely generous feedback regarding the speech, well beyond its merits. That's one big thing off my list, as I move onto the rest.

I'm feeling a bit tired, as I have been for weeks, courtesy of New England allergy season in FULL swing, so I'm going to workout now. I always feel energized and refreshed after a good workout...and it's another thing I can cross off my list. :)

I'm not even remotely prepared for my CD recording next week, but I'm hoping that changes between now and Monday. I pretty much know all the songs, and I'm really hoping the producer will coach me and work with me on the styles for each of the songs, because I haven't had a chance to give that much thought yet.

I meet with him on Sunday afternoon, so at least by then I'll have a good idea of what to expect for Monday.

Stay tuned!

Insanity

2009-06-17T09:58:00.001-07:00

I need to be better about balance. It's Wednesday afternoon, and I'm leaving for Nashville on Saturday. Before that, I have about 30 hours of work I need to finish, a keynote speech I need to write for a presentation tomorrow night, I need to pack, I need to practice...a lot, I still have to figure out which songs I want the band for, vs guitar, piano, soundtrack, etc..., prepare my house for renovations while I'm away, and I'm planning to spend Friday with my Mom as it's her last day here.

I thought it would be fine to fly out to Nashville the day my Mom was leaving, but I didn't realize how much preparation went into recording a CD. Duh. For someone else, recording this CD would be a huge focus for them, but for me, it's an expensive afterthought.

It's okay, I rationalize. It's just my first CD. This one will be a practice run. My rationalizations save me from all of my errors.

Part of choosing joy in life is choosing balance - not taking on more than you can possibly accomplish. You can't do everything well if you're trying to do everything at once. I need to be much better about not spreading myself so thin that I'm ineffective.

In the mean time, I'm going to schedule each hour of my time as wisely as I can, and I know I'll get it all done.

Life's Good

2009-06-15T19:21:00.001-07:00

We're having the downstairs bathroom redone while we're away, and we had to get a new washer and dryer since our washing machine was broken. We only had a small stackable unit before, and boy, did we upgrade.

After hours of online research, I went with the LG (Life's Good) brand steam washer and steam dryer. They are supposed to get stains out way better and just about remove the need to iron. Also, the steam dryer has a sanitary cycle that can clean items that are unable to be washed conventionally, like throw pillows, etc... I've also heard you can use it for dry cleaning - we'll see.

They cost a lot more, but they are huge, and they have great capacity, and will save like 1000 gallons of water/year, and they have virtually no sound, and they know if you put too much detergent in, and they have 10 different cycles, and all the new bells and whistles.

At Home Depot, they said that LG is by far, the best brand for washers and dryers. I read that online too. The reviews I read for these items were all unbelievably positive, so I'm hoping it's true. I've probably only done 10 loads of laundry in my entire life (no, it must be more like 25 - LOL), so the fact that I would spend the money on these items seems a bit silly, but my laundry girl is SURE excited! :)

Choosing Sweat

2009-06-11T12:13:00.000-07:00

Since I brought my Phatband blog back, I haven't talked about healthy living as much on this blog as I normally do. I have to say, though, working out makes me feel so much better mentally and emotionally. Being physically active does the same thing to a point, but when I give it my all to the point where I feel I'm going to collapse, endorphins are released and they make me HAPPY.

This Wii Personal Trainer is kicking my butt! I can't believe how challenging it is. Even pedaling as fast as I can go on the bike at the gym is noting compared to the aerobic workout I get with this trainer. It's amazing - truly.

I had a great workout earlier today. I was weak in the legs after (we focused on quads), and now I feel fantastic. I want to go out and buy everyone I know the Wii Personal Trainer. Watch out if you have a bday coming up! ;-)

Pahk the cah in havahd yahd

2009-06-09T09:22:00.000-07:00

I've decided to finish out my degree at Harvard. For so long, I thought school names meant nothing, and for the most part, I still agree...but it all depends.

First of all, at this point in my career, the fact that I'm still finishing my undergraduate degree is a bit ridiculous, and rather than finishing it out at some generic school, I've decided I want to upgrade.

Secondly, I have a bio that's used for speaking engagements, and the more I move along in my career, the more my bio is used in other areas. I'd like to graduate from a good school, since my schooling is looked at more in my career than in some others.

Also, I have never been really challenged, and I'd like to learn something. I would also like to make good contacts, and I think I can at Harvard. They offer hundreds of online classes, so I can continue to have a flexible school schedule, but I can also take classes on site if I want to, and that may be fun.

They have a continuing education program, and I know someone who graduated from there, and she is very bright, and she found the program to be challenging and great at the same time.

Since it's designed for adult learners, the admission process is different. You have to complete 3 classes first with a B or better grade, and then you can be admitted. I guess they feel as though that's a good way to assess whether or not you can make it there, and I think that makes a lot of sense.

I'm going to sign up for one class this fall, and I'm taking the summer off from school. As soon as I'm admitted, I'm going to look into their MBA program to take the courses that will be support me in that program.

I know I'll probably have to take more classes than I was going to in order to complete my undergraduate degree, but I think it will be worth it in the end. What's a while longer at this point?!

Airport Trauma

2009-06-06T10:00:00.000-07:00

I'm at the airport, waiting for my Mom to arrive from ATL. Being in an airport is giving me flashbacks of my loooooooong flights I just took. LOL - I didn't think it would, but apparently it is. I can't believe I'm going to be flying to Nashville in 2 weeks. It's okay, I'll get over it. :)

I'm excited to see my Mom! I don't think she's ever been to Boston's North End which is famously Italian and filled with lots of fabulous restaurants. Since we're all the way here, I think it's a good time to take her there! We picked up Alison on the way down to bring her to lunch too.

After that, we'll go back to the house and my Mom can relax in the hammock and read a nice book while I go to the store and pick up a few things to have a cook out tonight. I invited Alison and the girls over, so it should be nice!

Tomorrow, we head up to Maine to spend some time up there with my Mom, and she'll stay the whole week. I'm looking forward to going to the ocean! I haven't been in about a month, and I just love it.

Anyway, enough about me. :) I should probably see if she's landed!

Enjoy the day!

Weekly Schedule

2009-06-04T05:16:00.000-07:00

Obviously, the schedule above is not mine. :) But it sounds like a very busy and well rounded young person!

I'm a pretty well organized person, but I always bite off more than I can chew, which makes it hard/impossible to fit it all in. I've used daily schedules, and they work for a while, but because I try to pack SO much into one day, they don't work long term because there isn't enough room for the unexpected or the unplanned.

I've spent some time putting together yet another weekly schedule yesterday, and I've decided it's too unreasonable. What I'm going to attempt is a weekly schedule. I know how many hours I need to work each week, and if I want to work out an hour each day, six days a week, I can break that into 6 hours of exercise a week - some days that may be 90 minutes and other days it may be 30, but I'll go for the average of 60 minutes each day with one day off, and then I can plan the rest of my weekly to do's accordingly.

I know I'm going to be in Nashville the last week of the month, and that it will be hard for me to get a lot of work done that week, but I'm paid hourly as a consultant, so I want to plan to get in 50 hrs/week for the first 3 weeks of the month so that I can get in 10 the last week while I'm away and I'll reach my hours for the month.

My Mom is coming to visit, and she'll be staying with us the 3rd week of the month, so if I can get in as many hours as possible in the first 2 weeks of the month, that will give me more time to spend with her. It's going to be tight, but I think having a weekly chart of all I need to accomplish will help me get there.

Being organized, meeting deadlines, making time to exercise and taking control of your life will aid in your ability to lead a joyful life. :)

This is the life

2009-06-03T17:50:00.001-07:00

I guess Darcy took a picture of me relaxing with the hot tub half open the other day - classic move of mine when I go in alone... It's much easier to close, and I really don't need to open the whole thing just for me anyway. You can kind of see our hammock too on the right side of the photo. I just LOVE sitting in the hot tub, staring at the water, reading a book and enjoying the beautiful weather!

I know we only have a few months to enjoy the nice weather of NH, and sometimes I think I would want to live somewhere that is summery all year 'round, but other times I think I just wouldn't appreciate the wonders of summer as much if I could enjoy it all year. Who knows...

I do love the four seasons we have in New England, but I just wish winter wasn't the longest one! I like the snow and cross country skiing and White Christmases, but seriously, it seems to last forever...that's a bit much.

Anyway, for now it's summer, and I'm LOVING it!!! I think that enjoying the outdoors is one of the best treats we get in life.

A nice breakfast

2009-06-02T08:08:00.000-07:00

It was a beautiful, sunny morning, and I decided to eat my breakfast outside before heading into the office. There was a family, er a gaggle of geese with young goslings passing by. What a lovely site!

La!

2009-06-01T13:29:00.001-07:00

I'm leaving for Nashville in basically 2.5 weeks. I suppose I should start practicing!

I went through 8 of the 12 songs today. My voice is tired, so I'm taking a break, but I need to start warming up more, so that I get more miles out of my voice each day. After all, the days are going to be long in the studio, and I need to be ready!

I record each song, and then play it back and listen for opportunities to improve, etc... Overall, I'm really pleased with the way the songs are sounding, so that's good news!

I know I can do better, though, so I'm going to keep practicing. I want to make time every day for the next 2 weeks, and I should be able to do that for the most part...I just need to remember to do it!

I'll post a sample as soon as I have one that will load.

Choosing Hammocks = Choosing Joy

2009-05-30T13:53:00.000-07:00

I bought a hammock today, and it is absolutely heavenly. If you don't have one, go get one. Immediately. :)

Actually, they take up quite a bit of space, so heads up....but relaxing on a hammock in the sun with just enough shade, reading a book, hearing the waves splash against the steps...it's pretty awesome.

I'm bringin' phatband back...yeah

2009-05-29T13:25:00.000-07:00

I know, I know...it's annoying keeping track of all of my blogs...I just know that I need to make my healthy journey more of a focus than it's been. I've been going in too many directions, and I need to make sure I have my priorities straight. I'll still update this blog, and all of my other blogs, when I have the time, but for now, Phatband is back until I'm back on track! :)

Fake it Until you Make It

2009-05-28T13:03:00.001-07:00

Fake it until you make it is a concept I've heard in different areas of life...in sales, they tell you to fake it until you make it to project an image of success or to believe in yourself before you've seen the fruits of your labor. In other areas of life it's the same principle, when you want to have a certain frame of mind but you don't yet, fake it until you do.

I haven't been to the gym in a long time. Even recently when I've worked out, it's been hiking, kayaking, yoga, etc..., but I haven't been to the gym. I think if you are trying to lose weight and/or gain muscle, and you aren't a fitness guru, the gym is probably the easiest and quickest way to make that happen.

I love outdoor exercise and variations for working out, but I think there's something about the gym that makes me work hard, and in turn helps me reach my weight loss and fitness goals. I can measure the progress I'm making, time myself, keep track of accomplishments, etc... I will always take on variations of my work out and include things other than the hamster wheel gym activities, but I think it's important that I keep the gym in the rotation as well.

When I get to the point when I'm maintaining my weight, I can probably rely on outdoor activities, sports, yoga, pilates, etc, to stay fit, but with the amount I still have to lose, I need to work out hard core.

I haven't felt great since I got back from Dubai. I started eating the right things yesterday, but I didn't work out as I had planned to. I felt sick and tired, and I worked for 12 hrs, plus spent hours on my CD, so I didn't do it.

Today, I felt just as sick and weak and tired. It's rainy and gross, and I'm fighting off something. I slept for 11 hrs last night - that's unheard of for me! I got on the scale to a disappointing number this morning, and I knew I had to start faking it until I could start making it.

With all of my heart and soul, mind and spirit and body, I wanted to avoid the gym, but I didn't. I not only forced myself to go, I forced myself to work out HARD. 25 is the top level on the bike, and I did 25...only for a few minutes, but still! Most of the time, I was pushing myself as hard as I could.

I did about 6.5 miles on the bike, at fairly high levels, and then I did some chest and back work with the machines. I was going to do more, but I felt really weak from pushing myself so much on the bike, so I cut my workout a little short, but I was still there for about 50 minutes...not too bad. I did a calorie burning calculator, and it says I burned about 550 calories, so if that's true, that's good.

I have to admit - I'm a little tired now, but I feel better than I've felt in a long time. My mind feels sharper, I feel like I sweat out some of my bloat, so I feel slightly thinner, I feel good about myself, and I feel like my energy is coming back.

I have learned this lesson over and over and over, but I still manage to forget it. When I'm feeling lethargic, and tired, and lazy and weak, I need to get down to the gym and really push myself. My body will release endorphins that will make me feel better, mentally and physically. The mental and physical improvements will make me feel better emotionally. I know this. I know this!

So today, I faked it, and I made it in just one session. Now I'm a believer once again, and I'm hoping when it's time for my workout tomorrow, I'll remember this feeling and these realizations, but if I don't, I'll just fake it until I make it, once again.

It may take practice, and that's okay....somehow, I see a new bracelet in my future...LOL

Making progress in the studio

2009-05-28T06:49:00.001-07:00

I was supposed to have my songs narrowed down by last week, and I hadn't had a chance, so I narrowed the list down to the magical 12 songs yesterday. I recorded 16 songs at home, and I picked the 12 that Darcy and I thought were the best.

I'll post some clips within the next few days. So far, whenever I record myself singing on my laptop, I'm too close to it, and you just hear a ton of feedback. At this point, I think I'll need to be in the other room. :)

I also sent the payment in full for the CD. It's a costly little venture, but maybe someday I'll recoup the costs...doubtful, but you never know. I'm not doing it to sell it, I'm doing it because it makes me happy. If it makes other people happy too, well then that's a bonus.

On the food front, I was much better getting on track yesterday, but my weight is the same. I'm retaining water in a major way, and I know it will stop in a few days. In the mean time, I'll just do my part to get there as quickly as possible.

Someone needs to wire my jaw shut

2009-05-27T05:34:00.001-07:00

My weight fluctuation is reaching an all time level of insanity. I weighed 10 lbs less than I do today...2 days ago...The day before that, I weighed 7 lbs more. For the sake of creating an example, let's say I weighed 117 (LOL) on Saturday. And then I weighed 110 on Sunday. And today, I weigh 120.

Now I think it's safe to say we know those numbers aren't my actual weight, unless we're measuring in stones. ;-) You get the idea, though. What is wrong with me?

I was bloated the day I weighed "117." I ate what I was supposed to and worked out, and I was "down" 7 lbs the next day. Then I wasn't feeling well and I ate junk, and now I'm "up" 10 lbs from 2 days ago? Impossible.

I'm bloated for multiple reasons, and I feel fat and gross which is never makes me feel great and healthy, but enough is enough. I've been on a plateau for so long, all I do is gain and re-lose the same weight over and over again.

I'm up from the last time I saw my lap band surgeon, and I don't want to go back until I'm down to where I was then. I know I need a fill, and I'm going to make an appointment with my surgeon in MA, even though it's a giant hassle. Until I find a new MD in NH, I need to go somewhere. I have this great tool,and I haven't had a fill in close to a year - it's time I used this tool again.

I know I can handle today, so for today, I'm going to increase my water intake, reduce my sodium intake, make healthy, well balanced choices, and I'm going to make time to exercise.

I feel so much better about myself when I feel healthier - why would I ever want to feel anything other than that?

Barcelona

2009-05-26T06:18:00.001-07:00

I just heard back from the event planner, and there's a good chance I'll be invited to speak at the conference in Barcelona. I'll know for sure in the next few weeks. I just checked out prices from Barcelona to Paris because hello - it's on the way to Italy from Spain...it would be downright irresponsible of me to skip over Paris on my way...probably even RUDE! :) Anyway, I found a one way flight from Barcelona to Paris for $38!

So the new plan would be to stay in Barcelona for a few days, then Paris for a few days, and then Italy for a week. I'd stay longer, but we'll miss our little doggy too much. We can take a train from Paris to Venice in 4 hrs, or a quick flight, depending on cost... we'll stay in Venice for 2 days, and then onto the villa in Tuscany...not sure where yet...

I'm getting ahead of myself, as I don't know if they'll even select me to speak in Spain, but that would be exciting! I'm having a wonderful time lately, and I only wish I'd gotten laid off sooner! (JK)

Next stop: Italy

2009-05-23T07:28:00.000-07:00

(Well, technically the next stop is Nashville, followed by Dallas, followed by...most likely...Atlanta, followed by DC, but you get the idea...)

We have decided to rent an Italian villa in a coastal community. We aren't planning on trekking all around trying to see every landmark and tourist trap. We want to experience the foods, the outdoor markets, the vineyards, the restaurants, the music and the natural beauty of Italy. Another time, we may do the tourist thing...

We plan to travel to Italy in mid October. I may have a speaking opportunity in Spain at the beginning of the month in which case we'd spend some time in Spain and then continue onto Italy. I won't know about that for a little while though, but that would be neat.

I checked into first class travel, since I just went on a really long trip, and it was 10k each. Alrighty, then, we won't be selecting that option! It's only $500 for coach. I had a good idea: I'm going to buy 3 tickets. For just $500 extra, we will have the piece of mind knowing that no matter what, we won't be smooshed into cramped quarters with a stranger on top of us for our long journey. We'll have a seat between us that we can put stuff on, and we'll be able to shift our position during the long flight. I think everyone traveling a long flight should do that, as it's SO much less expensive than first class, and it accomplishes many of the same objectives. Problem solved!

Garbage In, Garbage Out - Part II

2009-05-23T03:58:00.001-07:00

Okay, the wrist bands have arrived. In case you missed it, a few weeks ago I blogged about how when we put garbage into our bodies, we get garbage out of our bodies. We aren't going to be performing at our highest rate, if we are fueling ourselves with junk.

I ordered wrist bands that say "Garbage In, Garbage Out" on them, so that I can wear it as a reminder to be careful about what I consume, and the implications of the things I put in my body. I hadn't put mine on until today, because yesterday I was busy consuming garbage (LOL), and I didn't want to wear the band until I meant it.

I put it on this morning, and I realized it's a bit loose. I don't think it's going to work for me. It feels like a dangly bracelet. I think I'm going to order another batch in a smaller size. I have no idea what size I picked, and it is probably supposed to be loose, but it's driving me crazy. I will keep trying...

I didn't eat the healthiest variety of foods when I was away. My stomach was slightly upset the entire time, and I pretty much went for whatever seemed the most bland, ranging from pizza to pasta in many cases. I only ate 2 meals a day, so I was hoping I didn't do too much damage, but I did.

First of all, I'm still incredibly bloated. I know that extensive traveling can do that to you, and it did. I didn't help matters by eating junk all day yesterday. I was so tired - I did not care at all that I was putting junk in my body, even though I know it only made me feel worse...and I used plenty of salt...more than plenty...

Today I hopped on the scale, and I think I was up 2 lbs from when I joined weight watchers like 2 months ago. Great job! LOL

I was totally bloated and very up in weight the day I joined, and I was down 10 lbs within four days of de-bloating and eating the right things. I hope the same will be true for me. I can't believe how much my weight fluctuates.

I know part of the weight gain is from eating bad foods while I traveled, and the other part is bloat. The bloat will be easy to get rid of, but the actual weight I've gained will be a little more challenging. It's okay - I'm up for the challenge! :)

After a week of avoiding vegetables and fruits out of fear, I am completely ready to eat healthy foods. I put garbage into my body, and now I'm getting garbage out of it. I feel fat, bloated, slow, achy and gross. I earned it.

I want to feel thin (which I won't be, but I feel it whenever I have a good loss), energetic, and light on my feet. That's the goal.

We now have a second refrigerator in our garage, and I'm going to the organic foods market to stock up on frozen meats today. I've put together an extensive grocery list, and I'm looking forward to getting back to the basics.

We are going to a BBQ today (and probably tomorrow), and I'm going to make my roasted vegetable with feta and sausage orzo. I love that dish. I'm going to buy locally grown organic veggies and grass fed chicken sausage. I'll plan to just eat that with a salad, and that will be just fine.

I already had my multigrain cheerios with blueberries and BGHfree milk for breakfast, so I'm off to a good start.

I have a bunch of work to do, so I want to get a few hours in this morning, but I also plan to take Henry for a hike and do some yard work and grocery shopping before the BBQ.

I had better get cracking!

Have a healthy and safe Memorial Day weekend, everyone!

No, it's not a wig

2009-05-22T13:37:00.000-07:00

It's an angora rabbit! How cute is that thing?

I showed the picture to Darcy, and she told me she had a rabbit once when she was a kid. He was a little bit nasty, and somehow she ended up giving him to her great grandmother...who Darcy suspects ended up eating little Flopper!

If anyone is in the mood for a 17 year old cat, let me know!

LOL - kidding!

You guys - I'm at goal!

2009-05-22T12:46:00.001-07:00

LOL

Darcy is having WAY too much fun with her iPhone apps - how funny is that picture!

I'm home...SO glad to be home...

Sights and sounds of flight

2009-05-21T07:37:00.001-07:00

I think every baby from England that was on holiday in Dubai was on my plane...and they were none too happy about it! Yikes. It was okay, but every time I started to doze off, there would be one or two or twenty high pitched wails. Lovely. :)

I was very lucky to have the seat next to me empty again - especially because the plane was SO crowded - there were probably only 3 empty seats on the whole giant plane. So far, I've been *very* lucky. I assume I won't be quite as lucky on the last leg of my flight, which appears to be another very full flight, but I was fortunate to have the luck I did the first 3 legs of the four part journey.

I think we're boarding. See you soon!!

PS - Yup, they just announced the flight is booked to full capacity. Fun! LOL

It will all be fine. :)

Pictures!

2009-05-20T20:50:00.001-07:00

Hotel lobby and exterior: (yes, that's live music being played in the first picture below)

Constant construction:

(Will be the tallest building in the world...I think...Armani is designing the interior, and his hotel will occupy the first 40 floors)

Gold Souk at Mall of Dubai:

Mall interior (live music again...):

Penguins!!!! At the mall!!!

Other friends...

The Bentley being auctioned off:

Entrance to Atlantis Hotel on Palm Island:

Windy oceanfront on Palm Island:

Atlantis from afar...

Construction of the man made island:

The hotels and residences all look the same on Palm Island:

A view from the bridge to Palm Island...you can almost see the Burj Al Arab (famously tallest hotel in the world - designed to be the eiffel tower of Dubai...)

Another man made island in the making...you can see it in the distance:

One of the many beaches:

A closer view of the Burj al Arab:

City view from the tour bus:

Jumeirah Mosque - the only mosque that non-muslims can visit in Dubai:

In the UK and in Dubai, they recycle their public trash. Good job! :)

Views from the abra (water taxi):

Old town:

My groceries:

Indoor ski area:

The blue thing is my room key. As you can see, it's in the shape of the hotel. I had one cab driver who really didn't speak any english, and I tried to show him my key to explain which hotel was mine. He said he didn't understand (as best as he could say it), but somehow I made it home! It's a well known hotel, so I didn't expect there would be a problem. Also, I knew the address...Anyway, from then on, I carried a map of the hotel area with me, and I had to use it with another cab driver.

Okay - I've bored you enough for one day! I'll keep the other 200 pictures to myself. You get the idea.

My flight leaves in less than an hour. Now I'm only 18 hrs away fom landing in Boston...if all goes as scheduled!

Cool airport

2009-05-20T20:47:00.000-07:00

I read somewhere that it's illegal to take pictures of or in the Dubai International Airport, so I'm certainly not going to, but I found this picture online.

It seems many other tourists didn't do the research I did on the social rules of the area...or just didn't care to follow them...I'm not sure.

All I know is that I saw far more knees and shoulders than I thought I would while I was here.

Mama, I'm comin' home!

2009-05-20T19:30:00.000-07:00

It seems like I've been gone forever.

I only got a few hours sleep last night, and it will be almost 24 hrs from now when I touch down in Manchester, NH tonight. I'm hoping to catch some sleep on the plane. It's going to be a long day, but I'm going to get to the airport *plenty* early, so I won't have to rush, and I'm just going to relax and take it easy.

The presentation went okay - just okay. I had been having technical difficulties all day, and we worked on it for quite a while. They were using an old computer with older versions of the programs I was using, and when we tested it *right* before my presentation, it worked just fine. However, during the presentation, the hyperlinks I had to the tools I had developed (as the majority of the presentation) did not work. Well, one did and the other four didn't. When I tried to launch the second one, it froze the whole computer.

I ran down to my chair in the audience, because I had hard copies there, and I did my best to keep the speech flowing while I walked to and from my chair from the podium, and while I ran diagnostics on the computer. LOL - can you imagine?

I was disappointed because it looked unprofessional. I had asked the event leaders to check the links in my presentation on their computer at least 5 times before coming. They never did. It was their outdated computer that caused the problems, but the audience didn't know all that.

Oh well - what can you do! It's good practice for things going wrong in the middle of a presentation. Considering they went majorly wrong, I think I handled the situation very well. They told me they would be asking me to join their advisory board for the next year's event, so that's a nice sign.

I'm off to the airport. See you soon!! XO

Tired

2009-05-19T20:31:00.001-07:00

Oh boy, am I tired! I'm so jet lagged. I thought I had resolved this by falling asleep at 11PM Dubai time the night before. Apparently, that only worked because I had been so exhausted from three prior nights of very little and spotty sleep. Now you tell me. ;-)

I went to bed at 11PM last night, and it took me until 4AM to fall asleep, and I had to get up at 7AM. I would prefer to have more than 3 hrs rest before giving a presentation, but I'll work with what I have to work with. I always feel as though lying in bed, even awake, is better than being active and only getting 3 hrs sleep. Let's hope my brain buys that.

I have to sign in for the conference in an hour, and I plan to attend at least the first session to get a feel for the event. After that, I may try to take a nap, although I'm a bit afraid, because I requested a wake up call this morning, and it never came. I also set the alarm on my US cell phone, and it didn't go off.

This all leaves me unsettled about making sure I get up at 6AM tomorrow for my flight. I found out that my Dubai cheapo cell phone has an alarm, so I'm going to test that today. I also know there is an alarm on the TV, so I'll try that as well. I'm going to have Darcy give me a wake up call if we can figure out how to call here from the US (LOL), and I'm going to personally request a wake up call at the front desk, letting them know I didn't get today's call.

One of the four alarms is bound to go off, but the uncertainty probably won't make it any easier on me to sleep tonight after this morning's scare! :) I think I'll sleep with the shades open too so that I'll see daylight peeking in.

I'm off to get ready. Have a nice night's sleep! :)

The average book

2009-05-19T10:53:00.001-07:00

is 80,000 words. I'm 1/16th of the way there. Oy vey.

Well, 80,000 is based on a 300 page book. I'm going for closer to 200, so that must be closer to 50,000 which means I'm 1/10th of the way done! That's much better. :)

Palm Island

2009-05-19T01:58:00.000-07:00

I was on that island yesterday -wild, huh? To get to the very top bar, you take an underwater tunnel to the Atlantis Hotel, a tribute to the lost city... somehow, I found the name ironic since this Atlantis was built on a man-made island of sand... ;-)

I still can't load my pictures because I can only access the internet through my work VPN and the pictures are saved to my local computer. Even after emailing them to my work email and saving them to my work computer, they still aren't coming up, so you can expect a flood of photos when I return on Friday.

I took 160 pictures just yesterday.
.

I started off the day at the hotels' roof top pool and hot tub. That was relaxing, and I read for about an hour after swimming. I wanted to stay longer, but I know you're not supposed to be in the hot desert sun too long out here.
.
After the pool, I headed to Dubai Creek where I took a water taxi to part of the old town.

The water taxi is called an abra, and it only costs 1 dirham (or 30 cents US) to take. The taxi driver on the way back hit 3 other abras in his travels. It was very funny, and it's a good thing I don't scare easy.

On the way to Dubai Creek, I spotted a double decker tour bus, and I'm so lame - I always love those things. I took a taxi to the nearest pick up spot, and the taxi driver (who barely spoke a word of English) tried to convince me to take a private tour with him. I just can't imagine that would have been the same since we couldn't communicate. LOL

Nice try.

The entire tour lasts 3 hrs, but it has many stops you can get off and visit and just hop on a later arriving bus. I stayed on the tour, sitting on the top of the bus and out of the shade, for about an hour and a half. I wanted to get a little color! Plus, it was better for picture taking to not be in the AC with the windows.

I'll post the pictures from that trip when I get home.

I finally got off the bus at the Dubai Mall, since it was close to my hotel. I went in for something to eat, as I had been up for 5 or 6 hours at that point, in the hot sun, without eating anything. I'm just not hungry in this heat, but between the lack of food and the hot sun, I was feeling a bit weak.

This mall was better than the first mall I visited. It had a gold souk, an aquarium, a dancing fountain, and they were auctioning off a Bentley! Somehow, I just can't see that happening at the Mall of NH.

I went to the aquarium, and they had penguins! That was very exciting for me. :)

After the mall, I came back to the hotel and relaxed for a bit. I found out there are some restaurants within walking distance, so I went for a walk to find dinner. I found a restaurant that looked good, but it was closed as they were filming a television show there.

I ended up going to an Italian restaurant. It was surprisingly good. I planned on staying for a while, as I brought a good book, and it wasn't crowded, so I ordered 3 courses: bruschetta, salad and Saffron Risotto with prawns in a Saffron sauce.

The bruschetta kind of reminded me of a slice of the Pizza Hut works pizza. Odd, I know, but still very tasty. The salad was very good, although they put bacon in it, and the bacon tasted like beef jerky. The Saffron Risotto was delicious. Not as good as the risotto I had in NYC last week, but prettay, prettay good.

On my way back to the hotel, I stopped into Johnny Rockets for a chocolate shake. I was stuffed, but it just seemed like a fun place to visit. I took a few sips while I read my book, but I left most of it. (Wasteful American)

I bought a fan at the grocery store yesterday. I can't sleep without some kind of buzzing, and I hadn't had it the past two nights. I didn't sleep well at all the first two nights, but with the fan, I slept 12 hours!

I was exhausted, mind you, but I feel myself again, for the first time since I've been here, and just in time to give my presentation tomorrow. I hadn't even practiced it (before leaving because I was too busy and since being here because I was too tired to think about it), but I just did a run through, and it went very well.

I actually went over on my time, and I had to rush through the last few slides, so next time, I'm going to be more efficient with my words. Normally when I'm presenting, I'm trying to stretch out the time, so this was a welcomed change. I really like the content I developed, so that always makes for an easy presentation.

I received a list of attendees today, and the majority are from UAE, Yemen, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, India, Pakistan and Jordan. Until arriving here, I had no idea how many regional phrases I used as part of my vocabulary. I have been very conscious about not employing those phrases in my conversations here, but I have had to catch myself several times.

It will be a challenge speaking to a group of people who may only have a literal grasp of English. I will have to choose my words very carefully. I practiced speaking in that manner when I just did my dry run, and I caught myself slipping into US slang twice. Once when I almost referred to employees with a strong skill set as bench strength and another time when I almost mentioned hitting something out of the park.

What is it with me and baseball? In the US, we use sports talk constantly in business. I'm not even a sports fan, but I do it out of habit, or out of a desire to connect with my audience on a more personal level. I will have to find another way to do this with this crowd, so that will be interesting.

I've clearly droned on enough for one day, so I'm off to find something to eat. It's 1:30 PM in Dubai, and I haven't eaten anything yet today. I'm just not hungry, but I know I need to eat.

After that, I'll probably relax by the pool for a while, and maybe take in a movie tonight. I want to be fresh for presentation tomorrow, and then I fly out Thursday morning.

Have a wonderful day!

Day One in Dubai

2009-05-17T14:03:00.000-07:00

I'm having trouble uploading the pictures I've taken. I'll try again tomorrow, but for now, you are stuck with my words. :)

The staff at my hotel are truly wonderful - all of them - I've encountered at least 10 of them so far. Top notch.

Cabbies are okay...they don't know the city as well as I thought they would, but they are fine. I heard it's really hard to get a cab here, and that the cab drivers are terrible, dangerous drivers. I haven't found that to be the case at all. I was in NYC last week, and those cab drivers make these cab drivers look like the most polite drivers I've ever seen!

For a full breakdown of all of my vendor reviews, visit my service rater blog. I'll give more details there, as they will go toward my research on friendliness by geography. :)

The mall here was big, but it was just like any other mall to me. Sure the floors were marble, but I'm so used to fake marble, I don't really care about the difference. The same stores in NH are here (sprinkled with some high end stores I've seen in NY and Beverly Hills), but really, nothing was all too different from what I'm used to in the states.

The ski area was unique, but as someone who as enjoyed the outdoor beauty of skiing in New England, it pales in comparison. I walked the whole mall, and I didn't spend a dime..or a dirham... ;-)

I didn't see anything I couldn't find in the US, and I was just a bit bored overall. It was 9:30AM EST and 5:30PM here, so I went to the movies and I saw a cute flick called the accidental husband. I got a little sick partway through, and I went to the bathroom and noticed that there are water sprayers next to each toilet in Dubai. Interesting!

...more to come... :)

Airline food

2009-05-17T10:29:00.000-07:00

Darcy and I just flew from California to Boston (6 hr flight) during lunch time, and all they served was a tiny snack bag. That's what we've come to expect on domestic flights in the US. We get it. The industry is suffering, and they are trying to keep costs low. It's fine with me, I'd rather save on the ticket and just know I need to plan in advance for meals.

I was shocked at the meals served on my British Airline's flights. Each 6 (or so) hr flight was a constant stream of food, snacks and beverages. The flight attendants must have come by every 15 (maybe 20, but I'm really thinking 15) minutes with water at the very least.

The breakfast they served when I first boarded included:

scrambled eggs with herbs
large sausage link
english bacon
hashbrowns
roll
yogurt
fresh fruit
breakfast dessert

Can you imagine? We had snacks and several beverage offerings for the next few hours, and then they came by with a sandwich that came with a muffin and a fruit bag.

I couldn't believe it. My trip to Dubai had 2 equally extensive meals. I can't remember the last time I had a meal on a plane, other than in first class, and it was hardly as extensive.

It's funny because Americans are the ones that eat the most, but we provide the least on our planes.

I skipped the second meal on each flight, but I was still full the whole time I was traveling. Imagine that?

Hotel, Sweet Hotel

2009-05-17T04:41:00.001-07:00

I could have kissed the ground in my hotel room when I finally arrived...but that would have been gross. ;-)

The second leg of my flight was fine. I didn't upgrade because it would have been $2500 (ha!), but thankfully, there was no one next to me in coach, so I had a perfectly comfortable ride. No laptop outlets, but I didn't even use it when I had it on the way. No video games either, but I still had a tv screen with movies and tv shows to choose from, and with the extra seat next to me, it was quite comfortable.

I have many, many things to say about my trip (naturally!), but I just wanted to provide a quick update. It's almost 4PM in Dubai, and I just woke up 45 minutes ago. Looking out my window, I just realized there is a really cool rooftop pool at a hotel next to mine. That is neat.

Anyway, I'm going to ease my way into Dubai, and I can't believe it, but I'm going to make my first stop the Mall of the Emirates. I wasn't even planning to visit a mall, but when I arrived, I saw that the city is very spread out, and you can't walk anywhere due to the heat and the fact that drivers will not even attempt to break for pedestrians, so I'm just going to check out the mall, dipping my toe into the pool of Dubai. :)

The mall has an indoor ski area, something like an amusement park, a movie theater, good restaurants, and I'm sure disposable cell phones which I want to pick up.

I'll keep you posted!

Layover

2009-05-16T12:20:00.000-07:00

More details soon. My phone isn't working, and my emails don't appear to be going through. I made it to London safely, but even the pay phone wouldn't let a call through to Darce. If anyone sees this, please call her and tell her I made it safely, and I'll find a way to be in touch when I'm in Dubai. Email and blogs are my best bets for now.

Thanks!

XO

Upgraded!

2009-05-16T04:24:00.000-07:00

It's not first class, but it's better than coach!

British Airways offers an upgrade for an extra $250 to World Traveller Plus class. It's no where near first class, but I took it.

In addition to what appears to be slightly wider seats with quite a bit more leg room, they offer the following ammenities:

Laptop connectivity: "First, Club World Business, and World Traveler Plus all feature in-seat laptop power connections. There are no connections in the standard World Traveler class."
Video options: "First features individual personal video screens offering interactive games and up to 18 video channels plus a choice of 25 films exclusively for their Personal Video Player. Club World Business features personal video screens featuring interactive games and offering up to 18 channels of the latest film and television programs. In World Traveler or World Traveler Plus, every seat on long haul flights has its own 6.3 inch LCD video screen offering 12 video channels and a flight information channel. World Traveler Plus adds interactive games."

So for $250 (for the Boston to London leg of the trip), I get my own tv to watch with movies, a place to plug in my laptop, video games to play and a bit more room. I think it's definitely worth it. Also, I found out that today's flight is FULL, so I'm very glad to have the extra room!

I had to take an aisle seat because that's all there was left, but that's okay.

I have no idea if the flight to Dubai will be full, but I'm going to try to upgrade for that leg of the flight as well. $500 of upgrades for just half the trip is kind of a lot, but the trip from London to Dubai is like 8 hrs.

I'm sure I would probably be willing to sell my soul for an upgrade midway through that flight after traveling since 5AM this morning, so if $500 is the going rate for sanity, sign me up. Plus, it's a business expense! :)

Flying the friendly skies

2009-05-16T03:47:00.000-07:00

My alarm went off at 4:15 this morning. That's early! Darcy dropped me off at Logan at 6, as planned. My flight departs at 8:20, but I like to be early just. in. case.

The TSA employee examining my passport exclaimed, "My, this is a brand new passport!" You betcha. I just got it yesterday! She asked to see a license as well. Glad I brought it!

I set off the security alarm about 10 times. At first I forgot that I had my phone in my pocket. Then we had no idea what it was. I was expecting a pat down, but finally the woman noticed my shirt has metal buttons. Duh. What kind of idiot wears a metal button shirt to the airport??!!

I took my shirt off, and thankfully had one on underneath - can you imagine if I hadn't???!!, and then I was good to go. They were very nice about it, and the poor woman behind me was joking with me about the whole thing. She is much more patient than most!

I got a muffin, ate my breakfast, and was settled into my seat to wait to board the plane by 6:30. Oy.

I'm hoping the staff arrives soon, so that I can check into the cost of upgrading. It's a LONG flight, and I would be oh so happy to spend it in first class. I'm sure every one else will be asking the same thing, so in a few minutes, I'm going to move my seat to the area right by the gate.

Cross your fingers for a fairly empty flight! Although I can't imagine a flight from Boston to London leaving on a Saturday morning would be empty. Oh well! It will be just fine.

That's all for now! Have a great Saturday!

I'll arrive in Dubai at 11:40 PM EST, and 7:40 AM their time. I left the house at 5AM, and I'll probably get to the hotel around 12:30 AM EST, so that's a LONG day of travels.

Someone is here - gotta go!